View Full Version : The Mad God's Artifact, my fan fiction, please have a look, and comment!

14-09-07, 22:31
I'm kinda desperate for comments. :vlol:
I'm at the start of Chapter 5 ATM, so I'll be working on it. But anyway,
here it is, chapter 1!

Chapter 1: Preparing

Lara woke up with a sudden jerk. Her bed had creaked loudly,
and it had sunken in a bit. Lara got out of the bed carefully, trying
not to damage it more. ”Nowadays you aren't allowed to relax,” she muttered while doing her daily stretching. Lara hadn't slept
properly for months. She missed her exciting trips around the globe.
Lara opened her wardrobe, took out one of her many T-shirts and a pair of soft sweatpants, changed into them and walked downstairs into the kitchen, where Winston was busy
making breakfast.
”Did you sleep well, milady?”
”Could've been better.”

Winston handed Lara a piece of toast and a jar of white beans in tomato sauce, and she scooped up a handful of beans
with the toast, and took a bite. Lara closed her eyes,
Winston, now making some tea, turned his head to face Lara and nodded, smiling. He handed Lara the newspaper, as usual, and
she quietly eyed through it. Nothing interesting.
Dissapointed, Lara ate the rest of her toast, finished her tea and went
upstairs again to braid her hair.

Five minutes later, after taking a relaxing bath, Lara turned on her laptop and checked her e-mails.
She rolled her eyes while deleting lots of ”You are the winner of 1 million pounds!” mails. ”I'm too poor, so I need more money.” She said to herself in a sarcastic tone while eyeing through her other mails. One of them catched her attention. It said ”For Ms. Lara C.” Lara immediately clicked on it, as the adress from which it had been sent didn't alert her. It said:

”Hello, Miss Croft. My name is Darial Zoazik,
and I have sent this mail regarding an ancient artifact,
namely, the emerald statue of the Mad God. This object was formed when an ancient tribe, who worshipped the Mad God, that was a very fond collector of gemstones, (According to old stone inscriptions found.) so when they made the statue, they hid it in their most secretive place, which, today, is in the pacific ocean. They meant to offer it to the Mad God, but they were all killed by a giant tsunami before they had the chance.

You probably wonder why I'm telling you all of this. That's because I'm a collector of religious objects, and I'd love to add this to my collection, and I heard you are quite experienced in the ”art” of raiding, so I decided to contact you. I want you to get this artifact for me, and then you'll get your payment that consists of 5 million pounds, when I've got it. Contact me via the telephone if you accept, we'll then go through what to do.”

Lara jotted down his telephone number on a notepad. She
decided to call him straight away, if he'd change his mind.
She picked up her wireless phone, and punched in the number.


”Hello, Darial Zoazik on the phone.”
”Greetings, Mr. Zoazik. I'm Lara Croft, the woman you mailed
regarding the Mad God's emerald statue.”
”Ah, yes. Shall we cut to the case immediately, then?”
”I'd like that.”
”Well, I must tell you that this may endanger your very life, though I guess you're used to that.”
”You could say that.”
”In that case, good. I will book your plane that will depart tomorrow immediately after our discussion, if you accept my offer.”
”That's fine. What about this mission, though?”
”The artifact is hidden somewhere on a large island in the most remote spot of the pacific ocean. I can't tell you more, my workers on the island will tell you the details when you get there.”
”Okay, but do you have any useful things to supply me with before my journey?”
”I'm afraid not, miss. I cannot afford that kind of gear. I'd guess you have the means necessary?”
”I think so.”
”Well, good. Do you accept my offer?”
”This seems all a bit vague. But, I can't dismiss an adventure like that.”
”I take that as a yes, then! Very good, miss. I'll book your plane now, if you don't mind.”
”Not at all.”
”Tell them you are awaiting the plane ZZ 1000 when you get to the

And with that, he hung up. Lara frowned a little, she then got up from her bed, punched in the code to her armory, and walked into the doorway. She took her brown backpack from a hook beside the entrance, and filled it with 2 small medical sets, a wetsuit, and 1
large box of ammo clips for her trusty 9mm's. She then leaned out of the doorway and tossed the backpack onto her bed, returned into the armory and took her two 9mm's, her blue-green leotard, brown shorts, white socks and brown hiking boots, fingerless black gloves, and her gunbelt. Again, she leaned out of the doorway and tossed the pile of clothing and the two guns onto the bed, returned into the armory, and took 4 grenades, 2 motolov cocktails, a small knife, a bottle of ice cold water, and since she had her wetsuit, she thought she might as well take 2 aqualungs with her. She thought for a moment longer if she needed anything else, shook her head after a minute, and returned into her bedroom, tossing the explosives, the knife, the aqualungs and the bottle of water onto the bed. She piled her equipment up beside her bed, closed the doors to the armory, and returned downstairs, where she accompanied Winston for the rest of the day. Late at night, Lara changed into her nighty, and lied down on her bed, thinking of tomorrow. Slowly but surely she soon fell asleep.

Lara woke up, peacefully stretching her neck as she lied there, thinking of her new journey to get that emerald statue. She happily
got up off her bed, and headed downstairs, and walked into the kitchen. Winston, who was kind of sad because he wouldn't have company for God knows how long, handed Lara a plate of pancakes, and a quite hefty helping of jam. Lara quietly took a spoon and put some of the strawberry jam onto the pancakes. She wasn't hungry, for some reason. Lara took her fork and impaled a piece of the pancake, ripped it off and ate it.
”Lovely,” she said as she chewed the piece.
”Thank you, milady.”

After her meal, she got up, took a bath, braided her hair and dressed up in the outfit she had picked out the day before, in the armory. Lara tucked away the gunbelt, her guns and explosives in her backpack, she'd equip herself on in the private plane. Lara counted
on her fingers if she had everything she needed. Lara went into the armory again and quickly nabbed a flashlight, and her red glasses just to be safe.

Lara tucked the flashlight and water bottle into the two side pouches of her backpack, put it on her back, and went downstairs and out the door. Winston stood there with her Norton Streetfighter readied. Lara hopped on her beloved bike, and started it up, waved goodbye to Winston, who looked quite saddened, and sped out of her Manor.
She arrived at the airport about 18:00, and the plane was to arrive at 18:20, so she parked her bike, went inside and talked with the nearest employee.

”I'm awaiting the plane ZZ 1000, where can I sit down?”
”Oh, right, miss... Croft?”
”Yes, that's my name.”
”Have a seat right there.”

The young girl pointed at an empty seat near the entrance to ”Private Planes.” Lara took a seat there, and waited for 15 minutes, before being escorted to the plane by Zoazik's henchmen. She entered the small plane, which was filled up by a buffet, 2 seats, and two bathrooms. A small TV had been fit into the wall opposite the seats, for the guests' enjoyment. The two henchmen who had escorted Lara, took control of the plane, and started the engines.
Lara quickly sat down and strapped herself tight, in case of a shaky start. They left the airport soon enough, and the seatbelt icons were turned into a green color. Lara got up, and unpacked her backpack, she put on her gunbelt, put her guns in the holsters, strapped them safely onto her legs, and hung the 4 grenades and 2 motolov cocktails
on the back of her belt. She sorted through the rest of the content in her backpack, and put on her glasses. When everything was sorted, she strapped the backpack onto her back again, sat down, and took a nap.

Keep in mind it's still not final.
Please comment, wether it's a good or bad one!

14-09-07, 22:37
it seems very good to me, you know how to write...
i liked it very much :tmb:

14-09-07, 23:04
Thanks, Dak. :)

I'll release Chapter 2 after 2 more comments. :p (Or at least when I have enough material to release another chapter.)

14-09-07, 23:13
I want more! That was great.

15-09-07, 09:03
OK, since this is like, the first time I ever gained 2 comments on this fic, here ya go, the second chapter:

Chapter 2: The Island

Lara woke up again, this time, the plane was shaking.
She heard someone talking on the other side of the door to the cockpit.

”Argh! Damnit, the controls won't respond! Oh, God! NO!”

Lara suddenly hit the side of the plane, her back aching in pain. Then, she heard a faint creak. Several of the lamps that lit up the plane fell crashing onto the floor. She heard the man at the controls of the plane scream to her.

”Miss Croft! Hop out of the plane now! We're exactly below the island!”

Lara didn't say anything, without a word, she opened the door to the plane, dove out and freefell through the air. She fell for about 20 seconds. The air was hardly breathable, and she hit the water with a splash. Lara lost her breath and jerked upwards to the surface, and got through it.
She took a deep, slightly panicked breath, and saw the island, which was about 200 metres away. She began crawling through the water, and soon enough, she reached the large island, which, funnily enough, was covered by a large round rock formation that acted like a shell, protecting the island. She swam into the only opening, and reached a beach, on which there was 5 workers setting up a large tent. She crawled up the beach, her muscles aching, and was greeted by the ”boss” of the workers.

”What happened to the other two guys?”
”They were... unfortunate. They lost the controls of the plane, and one of them told me to jump out the plane. I don't know what happened to them.”

He looked down at his feet, murmuring something Lara couldn't catch. Lara continued to the other workers, some waved merrily at her, some winked. Lara talked with the boss again.

”Where is the artifact, then?”
”It's been splitted into an unknown amount of parts, all scattered around the island.”
”That means quite the adventure. Lovely.”

She went over to water, took off her footwear and dipped her feet into the warm, clear substance. Lara thought of the adventure that was to come.

”Where will I sleep,” Lara said.
”I'll set up another tent for you.”

Lara nodded. The boss tossed her a grapple and a set of binoculars.

”Since Mr. Zoazik couldn't spare any gear for you, this is the least I can do.”
”Thank you.”

Lara fastened the grapple and the binoculars on the front of her belt. She had a feeling this was going to be her best trip yet.

Lara decided to test her grapple, and threw it against the rocky wall. It stuck onto an arrow-shaped rock sticking out of the rocks. She ran for it, and jumped, running across the wall a few times. She slid to a halt, and thanked the boss.

”This is lovely, thank you.”

He almost fell over when he saw Lara.

”Woah, that's some skills you got there.”

Lara smiled, and threw herself backwards, off the wall, and plunged into the water. Lara got out, and asked the boss:

”Where should I look for the first piece?”
”I suggest you have a look in the water.”

Lara nodded, took off her backpack, walked into a bush, and changed into the wetsuit she had packed. Lara strapped the two aqualungs onto her leg, and on the other leg she strapped the knife she had with her.

She walked out of the bush, and met several hungry looks. Lara
threw her backpack onto a rock, and plunged into the water. She ripped an aqualung from her leg, and plugged it into her mouth. Lara swam further down, and reached the bottom. The water was very clear, and she felt along the bottom of the pool. She felt a small crack, and digged her hand deeper into the crack, and grabbed something that felt like a large rock. She used all her strength and pulled the stone out of the way. She swam down the newly opened passage, which was pitch black. Lara had to feel her way through the tunnel, before being catched by a strong current. It sent her through several corridors flashing with light colors. She finally got close to the end of her trip, and was spitted out a giant waterfall. She swam up to the surface, and was greeted by a beautiful parade of green and blue lights. She marveled at these for a second, then climbed up a small set of stairs, revealing another waterfall, which was seethrough, and ice cold. She walked through it, shivered, and entered a massive chamber. The walls were
carved in several amazing patterns, which seemed to glow, casting light onto a small piedestal at the back of the chamber. She cautiously walked across the room, and up the steps to the small piedestal, on which a small piece of the emerald statue lied. Lara carefully picked up the piece. It burned her. Lara howled loudly.

”Bloody hell!”

Lara ran back to the ice cold waterfall and soaked her hand in it. The white hot artifact had turned her hand red and itchy. Lara sighed, and with her free hand, pulled out one of her medical sets, and pulled out painkilling lotion and squeezed a fair amount of it onto her burned hand, dropped the tube, and smeared the lotion all over her hand. It hurt, but she clenched her teeth. She reached for the set again, and pulled out a bandage, wrapped her hurt hand in it, and withdrew it from the cold water. Lara picked up the set and the lotion tube, put it in the set again, closed the box and put it into her backpack again.

She returned to the dangerous artifact, and examined it. She found, to her surprise, an inscription.

To finish the quest of searching and obtain your prize, cool it.

”Oh, of course,” Lara thought, ran back to the icy waterfall, took out her bottle of water, emptied it, and refilled it to the brim with the water. She put on the bottle's cap again, ran back to the artifact, unscrewed the cap, and splashed the liquid over the artifact. Rather than come off the emerald stone, it was absorbed into it. Lara picked up the artifact, it was now cold and clear. She tucked it into her backpack, took her water bottle, returned to the waterfall once and for all, and filled it to the brim with the cool liquid. She put on the bottle's cap, and put the bottle into the side pocket of her backpack, and left the waterfall. Now, how would she get out? The water current was one-way-only. Lara suddenly felt a small droplet of water bounce onto her head. And another, and another. She heard a loud crack and the roof burst in two pieces and water from the ocean poured into the chamber. Lara let herself be swallowed up by the water, and swam up the crack in the roof, up to the surface, near the beach with the workers. The boss winced slightly when he saw Lara's burned hand, holding up the carved emerald.

”I'll keep this until further notice,” Lara said with a certain coldness in her voice. The boss nodded tamely and went back to the tent.
Lara half snorted, half laughed at the boss' reaction. She looked round for a place to sleep, and found a deep bowl-shaped hole in the rocky wall. She went to get a sleeping bag back in the tent, and after setting it up, she quickly fell asleep.