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kthnxbai
22-08-08, 17:15
How many people here believe in love?

and if you do, to what extent?

Like, love at first sight and all that jazz


I personally don't believe in any of it... I think we just get attached to people... And society tells us we should love our family or the one we're with...

Discuss

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/familiar.jpg
from xkcd...their comics have got me thinking lately..that and I'm bored


btw, don't mean to offend anyone and I'm not putting down anyones opinions...I just wondered what most people thought about this

MiCkiZ88
22-08-08, 17:22
If you've not been in love, you'd think it doesn't excist. Love to me is all of these together:

Worrying
Jealousy
Caring/Protecting
Sweetness
Attachment
Lust


And if you really love the person, you would die for them. I would. I love my fiance, and I would.

kthnxbai
22-08-08, 17:25
Worrying
Jealousy
Caring/Protecting
Sweetness
Attachment
Lust


I've experienced all this for one person, but I would never say I loved them...

You may think that it's special with one person, or that you'll never get over them, because I have felt like that, I thought I loved someone... but I haven't seen them in a good while now, and I don't actually miss them...

I just got used to having them there...

And now I'm used to not having them there

rowanlim
22-08-08, 17:28
Yeah I believe in love. I believe in love at first sight, had been crazy about the same guy for more than 2 yrs. It's an experience & it certainly makes life very interesting :D

Elmer
22-08-08, 18:23
Yes I really and truly believe in love:)

pEhouse
22-08-08, 18:26
I was in love at least once. So yea, I believe love is real. But I don't believe in love at first sight, I highly doubt this is possible. And I don't believe in "love conquers all" because.... well, it doesn't. I'm trying to avoid love, too many times it's just no good.

Woop Legend!
22-08-08, 18:37
I think it is stupid and cliched for people to say they don't believe in love

rickybazire
22-08-08, 18:40
Worrying
Jealousy
Caring/Protecting
Sweetness
Attachment
Lust

Yeah, I would agree. These just show that you'd do anything for the person, and therefore possibly love the person.

Blue_light
22-08-08, 18:40
I believe in love, but not at first sight. I haven't experienced love yet, only had 2 crushes in my entire life.

Love at first sight looks so...unreal, fake. I mean, falling in love with someone at first sight just because he/she is beautiful without knowing that person....

kthnxbai
22-08-08, 18:44
I think it is stupid and cliched for people to say they don't believe in love

Why exactly?

You don't hear me saying I think it's cliched and stupid for people to say that they do believe in love

You're perfectly entitled to your own opinions, but you shouldn't be so dismissive of others

domina
22-08-08, 18:51
Well, in response to the cartoon, I think that is very true in many cases. I was there before. Staying with someone simply because we had been together for so long. He thought he loved me; maybe he did, but I still think it was just the familiarity that we had. Talking to someone everyday for 4 years will certainly have that impact on people.

But I do "believe" in love (although not love at first sight... that's just silly). I'm in love right now. It's not something you can really describe... Or it's not something I can describe. I just know it. I can just feel it. And it's not always flowers and romance and all that - I actually really can't stand that crap. There's just a genuine, passionate, loving, understanding, connection there.

Woop Legend!
22-08-08, 18:54
Why exactly?

You don't hear me saying I think it's cliched and stupid for people to say that they do believe in love

You're perfectly entitled to your own opinions, but you shouldn't be so dismissive of others

I am not being dismissive, I voicing my opinion. I think too many people out there try and act all 'woe is me, I cannot find love.Therfore, I do not believe in love'. The people who do this, in my opinion, should get off myspace bulletins and start parading around the real world.

Love exists, love for friends or sexual love. When you find it, you will know. Until then, stop bleating on about how you don't believe in it - you just need to experience it is all :)

silver_wolf
22-08-08, 19:06
I suppose it exists, but to what extent I can't say.

kthnxbai
22-08-08, 19:07
I am not being dismissive, I voicing my opinion. I think too many people out there try and act all 'woe is me, I cannot find love.Therfore, I do not believe in love'. The people who do this, in my opinion, should get off myspace bulletins and start parading around the real world.

Love exists, love for friends or sexual love. When you find it, you will know. Until then, stop bleating on about how you don't believe in it - you just need to experience it is all :)

I'm not all 'woe is me' nor do I spend all my time on the internet looking for sympathy or love or friends...

I do have a life.... and friends of my own

It's something I don't believe in, and it doesn't mean I'm wrong...

I was having a conversation with someone about this same subject, and just wondered how other people felt about it...

And nor was I 'bleating' on about anything

Again, this is just a discussion, with different opinions so please don't bring it upon yourself to make assumptions about other people and put them down, which is exactly what you are doing

Woop Legend!
22-08-08, 19:11
Making assumptions?! Hang on, I didn't actually specify you at all. This is just my opinion on the matter.

And yeh, you asked for a discussion on the matter, and you get conflicts of opinions. Please don't assume I am berating you in any way! Believe me I am not! I just believe it is a cliched sentament when someone says 'I do not believe in love'. I didn't read all of your post so I don't actually know if you said 'I do not believe in love' or not which proves how I am NOT trying to direct it at you.

Heckler
22-08-08, 19:13
Love is wonderful....but i think one should avoid it while youre young...
True Love=Marraige, Marraige=children, Children=stretchmarks, wrinkles, no sleep and eventually end u up in a nuthouse....

Off topic, does anyone believe in gay marraige?? I centainly don't....its really not necessary....

Woop Legend!
22-08-08, 19:14
I thought you believed in Gay rights being gay yourself? Didn't you post that article the other month? What makes you feel gay marriage isn't necessary?

Elysia
22-08-08, 19:19
Oh, love at first sight definitely exists... ;) Just ask any mother (and father)-to-be the first time she / he sees the first scan of her / his unborn child. It's quite scary... just seeing little Spawn move, his/her little heart beating away, realising that he/she was turning to look at us each time the nurse pressed down with the ultrasound doodad... :o I get all teary and overwhelmed just thinking about it! *pats growing belly and grins*. The little bugger isn't even born yet, and I already hopelessly love my son or daughter and I know his/her father feels the same way! :D

Dingaling
22-08-08, 19:22
Congratulations Elysia! :tmb:. Will she be called Lara if its a girl? :D

EDIT: Forgot to answer the question!

I believe in it. Actually it's not one of those things you do or don't believe it's real. I can see it all around me and I love my friends and family. Calling it an attachment or love is really no different - we gave a feeling that we have for someone a specific word. Call it whatever you want, it exists.

kthnxbai
22-08-08, 19:23
Making assumptions?! Hang on, I didn't actually specify you at all. This is just my opinion on the matter.

And yeh, you asked for a discussion on the matter, and you get conflicts of opinions. Please don't assume I am berating you in any way! Believe me I am not! I just believe it is a cliched sentament when someone says 'I do not believe in love'. I didn't read all of your post so I don't actually know if you said 'I do not believe in love' or not which proves how I am NOT trying to direct it at you.

Ok then fair enough.

I wasn't looking for an argument or anything.

Truce?
:hug:

Woop Legend!
22-08-08, 19:25
Yeh sure, sorry if I got really hostile.

:)

findme
22-08-08, 19:25
I believe it. :)

But in all fairness, if you truly love someone, you'd die for them, otherwise, it aint love.

Elysia
22-08-08, 19:26
Congratulations Elysia! :tmb:. Will she be called Lara if its a girl? :D

:D Thanks! Hehehee, I seriously doubt I will be allowed to get away with calling my daughter Lara - even my mother said I wasn't allowed to call my daughter Lara! Maybe a middle name... :p

kthnxbai
22-08-08, 19:30
:D Thanks! Hehehee, I seriously doubt I will be allowed to get away with calling my daughter Lara - even my mother said I wasn't allowed to call my daughter Lara! Maybe a middle name... :p

Congrats!

and Lara's a pretty name :)

regardless of the whole tr thing

Heckler
22-08-08, 19:33
I thought you believed in Gay rights being gay yourself? Didn't you post that article the other month? What makes you feel gay marriage isn't necessary?



Well partially because Marraige is considered a religious thing/ritual....
God sees gay acts as abomination (I don't blame him...Ive come across things in my life i really wouldnt like to remember)so i think the least we as gay men and women should do is not get married...After all, its easier to get 'divorced' if ones not married....
And on the other side...I was cross at the article because we were being compared to goats....irrelevant if i have marriage plans or not....
I have a married gay friend....he's very close to my heart....and it also gave that motive for me to become enraged at the article after i had seen Adrian (my friend) being depressed for days about it...(his sister bashed at him after she had read the article....long story....)

And another thing....I dont think gays should have kids....thats MAJOR unfair towards a child.......

Drone
22-08-08, 19:35
I do believe in love, in love at first sight and in everlasting love.

For me it's always 3 in 1 with no doubt :wve:

findme
22-08-08, 19:35
And another thing....I dont think gays should have kids....thats MAJOR unfair towards a child.......

I dunno about that but then comes to think of it, gay people wouldve been brought up their child in their environment, they wont know anything about being in a normal family.

Tihocan9
22-08-08, 19:36
I sure do, not only beleive in it but I know it is there. From the love I have from God and from what I have from friends and family I know its there. But I do not necessarily beleive in love at first sight. I beleive love can only be grown by showing compassion towards someone and has to be always maintained (meaning you have to be sure to make the love strong and always try and fix it when it isn't going right)

Seb_01225
22-08-08, 19:39
love makes people blind.
personally i don't really believe in all this lovey duvey bull****. but i do believe you can be in love with someone! I'm not saying its bad to be intimate with someone but i don't get it when people are just like lovesick puppy's i mean come on everybody's got flaws. when I'm in a relationship i want it to be about everything what we love and hate about each other because i guess when we both know the things we dislike about each other our relationship can only get stronger yeah. But i think love is often broken when the trust between two people is broken that really is something i don't like i really need to have ALOT of trust when I'm with someone!

love with family and friends is so different though but i guess its sorta the same!

Heckler
22-08-08, 19:40
I dunno about that but then comes to think of it, gay people wouldve been brought up their child in their environment, they wont know anything about being in a normal family.

Gays arent that narrowminded u know....However, i guess its totally different if he/she was molested by someone of the same sex when they were younger....
I think sometimes that there no such thing as "Ive been gay all my life"
Sexuality only blooms when youre a teenager....before that, its blind 'love'

MiCkiZ88
22-08-08, 19:58
I do ''believe'' in love at first sight. It doesn't mean just being atracted to the looks of the person, but their charm as well. It starts as a crush, but quickly develops in to love if it's mutual or you become friends. Experieced it couple of times.

Indiana Croft
22-08-08, 20:22
I don't yet. I've never seen true love, and until I do or experience it for myself, I'm inclined to believe its all fairytales and bull****

rickybazire
22-08-08, 20:31
I don't believe in 'love at first sight'. I do believe in thinking that something can exist from the person that makes you feel good.

Woop Legend!
22-08-08, 20:35
Gays arent that narrowminded u know....

You seem pretty narrow minded to be honest. I am not trying to start an arguement but you say gay people should not get married because it is a religious thing, well a lot of atheists get married. I think that is segregating gay/lesbian people from others.

Marriage is declared normal, are you saying that gay people should not be seen as normal or something? I am honestly just trying to understand where you are coming from.

As for the children thing, you cannot steriotype the fact that becuase the child will grow up with gay parents that they will never know what a family dynamic is like. It all boils down to normality, for one they will haev media influence of man and wife family dynamic. The fact that there is love in the family should really overrule the gender.

Crimson Tears
22-08-08, 21:46
I'm not inlove lol and I'm not looking for anyone either. :p So it means that I'm single! Besides, I like being single. :D

Heckler
22-08-08, 21:56
You seem pretty narrow minded to be honest. I am not trying to start an arguement but you say gay people should not get married because it is a religious thing, well a lot of atheists get married. I think that is segregating gay/lesbian people from others.

Marriage is declared normal, are you saying that gay people should not be seen as normal or something? I am honestly just trying to understand where you are coming from.

As for the children thing, you cannot steriotype the fact that becuase the child will grow up with gay parents that they will never know what a family dynamic is like. It all boils down to normality, for one they will haev media influence of man and wife family dynamic. The fact that there is love in the family should really overrule the gender.

Very true...You have a good point there...Ahh but i guess you can call me narrowminded because of certain principles and way of understanding Ive inherited from my parents....
Oh well....I think I might just one day understand how the world works if i move to another continent....which is soon....

rickybazire
22-08-08, 21:59
So it means that I'm single! Besides, I like being single. :D

Hehe, fun at times.

I'm going into college being single, so that's quite cool.

Indiana Croft
23-08-08, 04:35
I'm going into high school single lol, so I hope I can prove or disprove this love business lol

Dia2blo
23-08-08, 04:47
I believe in love, and love at first sight for that matter. I have, however never experienced it myself, as i'm not exactly experienced when it comes to relationships. Maybe i've watched too many romance films, or i just have very high hopes, either way, i can't wait for love :)

As for the gay rights stuff going on here, i think it is fine for gay people to marry- it is technically only a legal document, and if we feel close enough to someone to want to do it, why not?

as for gay guys/girls having children- why not? we all yearn to be parents (maybe the selfish gene still has a part to play) and as long as the child is taught right from wrong, as with any other parents, the only issue is bullying, and it is not fair to stop gay couples from having kids due to this, instead of tackling the problem of discrimination to begin with.

mau3genius
23-08-08, 04:58
Uhm, I do believe in love; not exactly in love at first sight but in love coming from a relationship where you share more than physical likeness/contact. Of course, If I believe in love in that way I must say I've never experienced it, seeing that, from MiCkiZ' list I've only felt lust and jealousy for the people I've been with :p
Lovely comic by the way, really made me laugh :vlol:



I used the word "love" too many times didn't I?

takamotosan
23-08-08, 05:01
sure, i believe in love.

i've seen it in many people.

i've never been in love, but i've seen it.

but i don't think love is this necessary thing that simply must be in everyone's lives (i mean romantic love. everyone needs love from their friends/family)

Andariel
23-08-08, 05:05
I think it exists. I don't trust people enough to be in love. So I'm remaining single. Unless of course someone gives me reasons to trust them enough but I don't think that will ever happen.

Quasimodo
23-08-08, 05:06
I believe in love, especially the caring, loyal kind. I'm skeptical of love at first sight.

Indiana Croft
23-08-08, 05:40
I've seen so many people fall in love and fall out of love like skydivers on a plane. I've seen people pretend to love someone for personal gain. I've seen people be together and not be in love at all.

I've never, ever seen true love, and I doubt I ever will. I believe people can have long, meaningful relationships, but not eternal love, not the kind of love people dream about. I really hope I'm wrong, but I'm inclined to say love doesn't exist.

erosan
23-08-08, 05:58
I think it is stupid and cliched for people to say they don't believe in love

same

xxitsxnadyaxx
23-08-08, 06:16
love at first sight = lust/physical attraction

once you get to know a person you may start loving them :)

violentblossom
23-08-08, 07:05
love at first sight = lust/physical attraction



Agreed.

I believe in love because i am in love.. with both my fiancee and daughter.. i feel that being in love is different from loving someone. Being in love is.. a higher degree.

I don't believe in love at fist sight, but i do believe that sometimes people can feel strong connections with people theyve just met.

Elysia
23-08-08, 09:30
I've seen so many people fall in love and fall out of love like skydivers on a plane. I've seen people pretend to love someone for personal gain. I've seen people be together and not be in love at all.

I've never, ever seen true love, and I doubt I ever will. I believe people can have long, meaningful relationships, but not eternal love, not the kind of love people dream about. I really hope I'm wrong, but I'm inclined to say love doesn't exist.
You know, I almost pity you... how very cynical! Are you saying that you don't know of *anyone at all* who has stayed together because they love each other, and that absolutely everyone is only together for personal gain or for fear of being alone?!?

No one anywhere is going to have a 'fairytale romance' forever and ever, because they're, well, fairytales. Life is hard and rarely as you dream it will be - be it in love, work, your successes etc... it takes a lot to face up to it sometimes, but it is highly unlikely that you're going to end up being that film director or games designer you've always dreamed of - but I can tell you quite categorically now that after 14 years of being with my other half, I love him and he loves me. Yes, we drive each other nuts sometimes. Yes, we sometimes need our own space. Yes, there are times when I could quite happily drown him and vice versa... but that doesn't mean we don't love each other - that just comes from living with someone 24/7, 364 days a year and basically being human. We're about to bring our first child into the world - a child that we have planned for together and that we both very much wanted - and are looking forward to it so much... we know it is going to be hard work, but it's something to cement our relationship even more securely. Then there's my parents - 32 years together, 3 children and counting... and still going strongly. You should see them together - there are times when they're still like lovestruck teenagers, and it's awesome.

Of course love exists, between all manner of people, not just people forming bonds for sexual relationships. Love between parent and child, love between siblings, love between friends... it's everywhere. I know that's not a very fashionable statement - it's far more chic to decry love and say it's an outmoded concept and be all cynical and everything - but love really is what drives us. Without love, we wouldn't have families, we wouldn't bond with others - we'd be solitary creatures by nature, and we just aren't. Sure - love is for good, solid biological reasons, but that doesn't make is any less real... love is very real because it keeps us together, ergo it keeps us safe. We actually secrete hormones that bond us together with our loved ones (myrmaad knows more about this than I do) - we are, by our very biological makeup, designed to love; it's what keeps our species going. :)

MiCkiZ88
23-08-08, 09:39
@Ely: :hug: I've seen so many people fall in love and fall out of love like skydivers on a plane. I've seen people pretend to love someone for personal gain. I've seen people be together and not be in love at all.

I've never, ever seen true love, and I doubt I ever will. I believe people can have long, meaningful relationships, but not eternal love, not the kind of love people dream about. I really hope I'm wrong, but I'm inclined to say love doesn't exist.
Ouch. That's almost an insult to me. I'd do everything for my fiance. I'd do things I hate* just for him. I'd give my life protecting him if I had to. Why? Because I love him. What do I get from it? Nothing except a good feeling, and a feeling that he knows he is loved, and that I'm loved when he says those three magic words. I just want the best for him.

You could of course say that love is selfish, but I can't really bother counter arguing that.

*How can there be hate without love?