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View Full Version : Why do people always bring up the "negative"?


MattTR
26-01-10, 14:55
School, Work, you name it.. you do a million things right, yet they bring up one thing wrong. Doesn't that bug you? :pi:

With me, I try to do my hardest at whatever I do, but sometimes I make dumb mistakes because sometimes I have too much on my mind or just aren't thinking.

Either way, I'll continue to do the positive, even though it doesn't ever out weight the negative, and I hope to now try my hardest at everything so I don't make any more mistakes with whatever I do, school, work, or with life in general.

Paddy
26-01-10, 14:57
I think sometimes you gotta bring up the negatives like work and school, talking about that stuff takes a lot off your shoulders.
Definitely thinking positive is the best way but if you have to let off steam then thats a better result then keeping it bottled.

AmericanAssassin
26-01-10, 14:57
The world needs positive and negative people to function. There is no positive without the negative. I, personally, can't help being a negative person. Maybe it was my upbringing or the events that have occurred throughout the years. I don't know. There's far more to be negative about for me than there is to be positive about. It is harder for some people to be positive and upbeat than it is for other people.

Phlip
26-01-10, 14:59
They're probably like that so you know whatever isn't mentioned is fine. That's how I see it.

Capt. Murphy
26-01-10, 15:07
It's 'cause you gotta be perfect every second of every day.

But seriously.... There are times we try our best or do what we think is right and we feel grief if someone points out something wrong or criticizes us. But there are also times (I personally) appreciate constructive criticism....

One could try to see things as a constructive criticism, or just be thankful you're not as grouchy, or picky as the person berating you.:)

LightningRider
26-01-10, 15:09
The negative only makes us strive better.

But I only see the positive most of the time... >.<

MattTR
26-01-10, 15:09
They're probably like that so you know whatever isn't mentioned is fine. That's how I see it.

That's a good point, but I like to be complimented sometimes when I do something right, doesn't that also mean that I'm doing the right thing?

It's complicated I guess.. :p

Sgt BOMBULOUS
26-01-10, 15:09
Because people generally find the negatives more interesting... Strife, Drama, Crisis. Just look at the news :D

Jack Croft
26-01-10, 15:11
Posistives make you big headed and cocky, negatives spot the flaws and make you better person, or thats how I would see it. :p

MattTR
26-01-10, 15:12
Because people generally find the negatives more interesting... Strife, Drama, Crisis. Just look at the news :D

Definitely another good point.. you don't see people getting all riled up over the charities out there and their good doings.. :pi:

AmericanAssassin
26-01-10, 15:14
Posistives make you big headed and cocky, negatives spot the flaws and make you better person, or thats how I would see it. :p

Yes and no. I'd say a fair balance makes you a good person. Too much of either makes you an ass. :p

Carbonek_0051
26-01-10, 15:17
I'm a very positive person, I can see postitives in pretty much anything. Although I can have my negative moments, but who doesn't?:p

People tell me it's a bad thing to be so postitive all the time.:o

AmericanAssassin
26-01-10, 15:20
People tell me it's a bad thing to be so postitive all the time.:o

Sometimes, but on the other end I'm too negative. It make me seem like a major jerk. Oh well. :p

Keir_Eidos
26-01-10, 15:21
If I'm giving feedback to someone else, I always go with the positives. Through out education and work, I find positive feedback far more useful and motivational.

That said, day to day, I often focus on negatives first, it's something I'm trying to work on. (I think customer service/community people often this way inclined).

CerebralAssassin
26-01-10, 15:27
cause discussing the positives of a person is boring,and discussing the negatives is a juicy, fun activity.;)

Shark_Blade
26-01-10, 15:29
When I'm critical, they said I'm negative.
When I'm positive, they tell me to be realistic.

Who cares what people think. Do the things that you want to, and if you believe it's good for you, go for it.

Catracoth
26-01-10, 15:29
I always bring up negatives, constantly, everywhere. Keeps things real.

Eddie Haskell
26-01-10, 15:31
Without a negative to compare it to, the positives wouldn't be very positive now would they... ;)

Getting negative "advice" is a sign that the person cares about you and wants you to succeed. Notice I said advice, negative criticism can be quite different. One is meant to help you improve, the other is possibly meant to hurt or shame. It is usually easy to tell them apart.

AmericanAssassin
26-01-10, 15:34
Getting negative "advice" is a sign that the person cares about you and wants you to succeed. Notice I said advice, negative criticism can be quite different. One is meant to help you improve, the other is possibly meant to hurt or shame. It is usually easy to tell them apart.

You know, you're a very wise person. That makes complete sense. :tmb:

Eddie Haskell
26-01-10, 15:40
You know, you're a very wise person. That makes complete sense. :tmb:

Thank you, and do you know what wisdom is?

It's a sign you're getting very, very old. ;)

LightningRider
26-01-10, 15:45
Without a negative to compare it to, the positives wouldn't be very positive now would they... ;)

Getting negative "advice" is a sign that the person cares about you and wants you to succeed. Notice I said advice, negative criticism can be quite different. One is meant to help you improve, the other is possibly meant to hurt or shame. It is usually easy to tell them apart.

Heh, this pretty much the perfect answer. :D

Shauni
26-01-10, 15:48
I try to be realistic with people, but stay nice at the same time. I'll compliment them on what I honestly like and also bring up what might not be so great about it. I try to keep it positive, but with some people it's hard. So for those people I try not to make a comment at all lol :p

I do know how it feels when you work hard on something and there are so many wonderful things about it, but there might one tiny flaw in it and that's the only thing the other person can see. My Mother was this way, so I ended up just not showing her anything I would make or write because I knew she would only see the bad in it. And I'd rather be happy with it myself then try to make it to someone else's standards. Especially if they don't even care to see it after you "fix" it for them.

jamieoliver22
26-01-10, 15:50
That's just what Laura does... :pi:

john_york
26-01-10, 15:52
That's just what Laura does... :pi:

Understandable - there's a lot of negatives to bring up, Jamie... :whi:


Nawwww - luff ya reeeely! :hug: :vlol:

Phys
26-01-10, 15:57
Maybe the "negative" things are only brought up to make sure you know how to correct yourself next time. I know myself that its annoying not to be reminded about good things as many as the bad, but then we can work towards making the bad, good. :D

Encore
26-01-10, 16:00
Sure, knowing your flaws can help you become a better person.

But there are also people who actually only want to bring you down. And to that I say, **** them. :tea:

jamieoliver22
26-01-10, 16:04
Understandable - there's a lot of negatives to bring up, Jamie... :whi:

Nawwww - luff ya reeeely! :hug: :vlol:

Oi you, bugger off :p I could say the same... :whi:

john_york
26-01-10, 16:09
Yeah, if you were talking about someone other than me... ;)

AmericanAssassin
27-01-10, 04:14
^ Lol. :vlol:

Ultimate_Lara
27-01-10, 05:17
People like offloading their problems I guess!
Always look on the bright side...

Melonie Tomb Raider
27-01-10, 07:20
I think we could all benefit from being more positive. :D

Ikas90
27-01-10, 07:24
I'm a very positive person, I can see postitives in pretty much anything. Although I can have my negative moments, but who doesn't?:p

People tell me it's a bad thing to be so postitive all the time.:o

Same here. :D

Even through the bad things that have happened to me, I knew that something positive would come out of them. The key is to look at the big picture.

Carbonek_0051
27-01-10, 07:42
Same here. :D

Even through the bad things that have happened to me, I knew that something positive would come out of them. The key is to look at the big picture.

Exactly.:tmb:

xXhayleyroxXx
27-01-10, 23:02
it bugs me loads :p they're always really hyprocritical - for example - 'you need to contribute more' so she buggers off when i'm contributing

umm, thanks miss

Rachie737
28-01-10, 00:45
Why are people so negative? Because they're all so pessimistic. ;)

But that's what we need, really. Otherwise, we'd be let down terribly if something doesn't go well. We need the balance of negativity and positivity to realize the good parts of life.

In short anyhow, without going all philosophical. :D

spikejones
28-01-10, 00:57
School, Work, you name it.. you do a million things right, yet they bring up one thing wrong. Doesn't that bug you? :pi:


as my step father used to say, "It only takes one 'aw ****' to forget a dozen 'atta boys'" and trust me - I know all too well that this is quite true. I have a some really epic 'aw ****s' that people I've never met like to judge me upon when they find out about them. The only thing you can do is just do the next right thing and try to earn peoples' trust and respect. Eventually they will forgive (but never forget) about those 'aw ****s' when they see you doing good for yourself. Some people though will never forgive you for those 'aw ****s' and those are the ones you shouldn't worry about wasting your time on. They have problems of their own they need working on.

scoopy_loopy
28-01-10, 01:11
There was a poster in my Chem classroom back in highschool, it said, "When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, they'll never forget."

Its so true :p

spikejones
28-01-10, 01:14
"When you're right, no one remembers.


reminds me of:
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