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View Full Version : Opinions on eye-contact?


Phlip
27-05-10, 04:35
There's only two people I'm perfectly fine with making it with, but for most other people if I do it for over a few seconds, I feel uncomfortable.

Your thoughts?

Andyroo
27-05-10, 04:38
I can't make eye-contact with anyone for more than about a second. Just feels wrong. Especially in job interviews and stuff with complete strangers or someone that's judging how you act.

And I don't know anyone on that 'level' that I can make eye-contact without it feeling awkward and uncomfortable, like a boyfriend or best friend.....

MangelinaJolie
27-05-10, 04:42
I'm usually able to make eye contact with people I don't know, and people I do know I'm comfortable with doing so. The problem otherwise with strangers comes when I start to become conscious of it, and then it becomes difficult and uncomfortable, and I pretty much give up on it. I just hope that it doesn't make me seem rude or disinterested.

If someone is staring at me, however, then I force myself to stare back until they stop. That bugs me more than the eye contact itself.

Melonie Tomb Raider
27-05-10, 04:45
I always make eye contact. Eyes are the window to our souls, it really helps to read people better when you're making eye contact.

The only time I don't make eye contact is if someone makes me feel uncomfortable and I am trying to avoid prolonged conversation.

Alpharaider47
27-05-10, 04:48
I tend to make eye contact with everybody unless I'm talking about something that troubles me, or if I'm thoughtfully listening to someone. I've always been told that it's a sign you're paying attention to what someone is saying, and as Melonie said, the eyes are the windows to the soul.

]{eith
27-05-10, 04:49
I always look people in the eye when speaking to them. It's just natural.

spikejones
27-05-10, 04:50
Eye contact isn't something I ever pay conscious attention to, to be honest. I'm sure theres plenty of people I do make eye contact with, but for the most part when I'm talking to someone (such as a customer at work) my eyes are wandering all over the store. When it comes to job interviews and I want to make it at least look like I'm making eye contact, especially if I'm feeling nervous for some reason, i just look at their mouth.

Feather Duster
27-05-10, 04:56
I try to look people in the eye. It's awkward looking anywhere else.

Though with people I don't really know, it feels weird. Like they can see everything thats wrong with me, physically speaking. So usually I just stare straight ahead and occasionally look at them/their eyes.

Aranara
27-05-10, 05:09
I always look in someone's eyes when I talk to them. And when I'm scared I stare in that person's eyes because I force myself to not be scared. :)

Lara's Nemesis
27-05-10, 05:40
I prefer a balance, I make eye contact for a few seconds then look away. Too much eye contact is a bit strange to me.

Some animals see it as a threat so it must freak them out a bit as well. :D

tonyme
27-05-10, 06:59
I keep a balance. Sometimes when I'm talking to someone, I interrupt the eye contact and look somewhere else, to make it seem I'm concentrating or thinking about something.

Glašon
27-05-10, 07:11
Sometimes I get a little.... intense with eyecontact, I think :p I sort of forget that I'm not looking anywhere else.

Minty Mouth
27-05-10, 07:28
When I'm talking to someone I am not familiar with I spend most of my time obsessing over whether I am making the perfect amount of eye contact. I have big issues with this :p

Quasimodo
27-05-10, 07:29
Sometimes I get a little.... intense with eyecontact, I think :p I sort of forget that I'm not looking anywhere else.

I can relate, I feel like I'm making the other person uncomfortable if I hold eye contact for too long, but then I don't want to look rude or disinterested, either :p

Glašon
27-05-10, 07:32
I can relate, I feel like I'm making the other person uncomfortable if I hold eye contact for too long, but then I don't want to look rude or disinterested, either :p

Yeah! It's such a delicate balance!

Psychos'Я'Us
27-05-10, 07:33
I love making eye-contact :D It makes some people uncomfortabe :mis: It's so fun <3

Aranara
27-05-10, 07:37
I love making eye-contact :D It makes some people uncomfortabe :mis: It's so fun <3

I do that in trams...I stare at people without acknowledging it :p

A few days ago I made a kid cry because I kept staring at him and then I smiled like a complete maniac xD

lcaddict
27-05-10, 07:38
I love making eye-contact :D It makes some people uncomfortabe :mis: It's so fun <3

Lol, gotta remember that:)


Anyway, I don't quite look in others' eyes when I speak with them..

EscondeR
27-05-10, 07:39
I do that in trams...I stare at people without acknowledging it :p

A few days ago I made a kid cry because I kept staring at him and then I smiled like a complete maniac xD

What a mature entertainment :p

Glašon
27-05-10, 07:40
I do that in trams...I stare at people without acknowledging it :p

A few days ago I made a kid cry because I kept staring at him and then I smiled like a complete maniac xD

:vlol: "Get in mah van!"

Quasimodo
27-05-10, 07:41
What a mature entertainment :p

Mean-spirited entertainment is the best kind! j/k:p

lcaddict
27-05-10, 07:43
:vlol: "Get in mah van!"

:vlol:
She has the guts to do and say that:vlol:

Aranara
27-05-10, 07:43
What a mature entertainment :p
If you had a 4 year old stare at your for 15 minutes you would've done the same :p

:vlol: "Get in mah van!"
:vlol:

Mean-spirited entertainment is the best kind! j/k:p

It is :p To some extent though...

Apathetic
27-05-10, 07:45
OMG! :eek: I HATE when people stare at you on trains. It's like the most ****ing annoying thing ever!!

EscondeR
27-05-10, 07:47
If you had a 4 year old stare at your for 15 minutes you would've done the same :p


Maybe a poor kid has never seen such a cutie in his short life... and you've ruined it for him :smk:

:ton:

lcaddict
27-05-10, 07:48
If you had a 4 year old stare at your for 15 minutes you would've done the same :p



Agreed!

TRhalloween
27-05-10, 07:51
I find it really difficult. I'll look for a few seconds and then look to the side.

lcaddict
27-05-10, 07:52
I find it really difficult. I'll look for a few seconds and then look to the side.

I think the best thing to do is to stare at their nose, that way, they won't know if you look in they're eyes or not.

Apathetic
27-05-10, 08:00
I've never had any problems making eye-contact with people.. I mean it's the proper and polite thing to do.. I'm kind of surprised to see the other replies on here.
Why is it hard for you guys?

TRhalloween
27-05-10, 08:02
I think the best thing to do is to stare at their nose, that way, they won't know if you look in they're eyes or not.

Thanks, I'll try that :D

Kelly Craftman
27-05-10, 08:34
When im talking to someone then, I use eye contact; but like if I was on train or something and I saw someone making eye contact with me I would feel awkward

TRhalloween
27-05-10, 08:37
I've never had any problems making eye-contact with people.. I mean it's the proper and polite thing to do.. I'm kind of surprised to see the other replies on here.
Why is it hard for you guys?

It's part of my disorder, I'm guessing :P

da tomb raider!
27-05-10, 08:40
Come to think about it, I don't usually make eye-contact, but I have nothing against it. My eyes just tend to wander whenever I'm talking to someone. And people are more than welcome to stare at me on public transport. I mean, who can blame them, right?

Cynic
27-05-10, 08:42
On public transport and with strangers I usually don't make eye contact, because nowadays most people think that you are staring at them, like they were somethin strange, so I rather look at something inanimate. But if I'm talking to someone, I try to keep the contact up.

MiCkiZ88
27-05-10, 09:13
Often do look in to the eyes, but if I get uncomfortable, I usually turn my head or stare at nothing like I am about to think.

Sometimes the eyes just scare me.. Some people have gigantic eyes that look like they are about to pop out.

Punaxe
27-05-10, 09:16
It's definitely been something my parents had to teach me, or rather force me to do, but I don't mind it now. Just if I do it for too long it starts to feel like staring, at which point I generally produce a few saccades towards the environment or the mouth before making eye contact again.

Glašon
27-05-10, 09:26
Just if I do it for too long it starts to feel like staring, at which point I generally produce a few saccades towards the environment or the mouth before making eye contact again.

Lol, one of the things I hate about this is that you can suddenly find yourself realising that they have really beautiful lips and then your eyes keep going flicking there. :cln:

Buffy87
27-05-10, 09:49
I am quite good at maintaining eye contact with people. Now, at least. I have to confess that before I started my law course and my advocacy training I was not so great at maintaining it, but as a lawyer you have to constantly maintain eye contact with either the judge or the jury or whoever so I am now quite good at doing it.

That sounds a little bit immodest maybe but before hand I was quite shy and wouldn't keep eye contact but now I don't find it scary or daunting at all.

robbie_rawr
27-05-10, 09:53
I'm terrible at looking people in the eyes,I can only look at my boyfriends anyone else and I cant stand it for more than a second, It may seem rude if I look else were when talking to people.

silviu_raider
27-05-10, 10:07
I use eye-contact with everybody, friends, family, and even with people I don't know.
I think it's a way of showing that you're interested in what that person has to say and that you're being honest when you talk to them.

*laralover*
27-05-10, 12:07
I always make eye contact with people im talking to its just natural. If its a partner it can be quite sexual. I hate when your out and about for example waiting ona bus and theres loads of people and you have nothing to stare at. Its like people think your staring at them :p

Ikas90
27-05-10, 12:19
I tend not to make too much eye contact. It depends on how confident I am around the person.

CuteKittenlol
27-05-10, 12:20
I use eye contact, but look away after a few seconds and look back because tbh i find it creepy when people are fixed on my eyes so i try not to do it myself, lol

tranniversary119
27-05-10, 12:25
It usually depends on the person. I can force myself to look into someones eyes, but I have to really try not to laugh :p. So usually I look to the side a couple of times, but I'm usually good at it.

At my job interview yesterday I maintained eye-to-eye contact 90% of the time, because she would look to the side too anyway. It's kind of hard because I have trouble being serious.

Capt. Murphy
27-05-10, 13:17
I do it on occasion but for a very brief moment. It's usually when I'm wanting to make sure they get a message. But I know about the 'awkward' feeling you can get. My first day (or week?) in French class in 12th grade -iirc, we had to practice some french phrases/greetings... And I was so shy, talking to that girl, then making eye contact.... Oh gawd. Talk about torture. :hea:

If 'Awkward' were to have a temporal/tangible form -at that moment it would've been a giant purple ape riding around the room on a unicycle, in a pink tu-tu playing rock you like a hurricane on the accordion. or smth. :pi:

Oh yeah. There was one time I did that. Look someone in the eyes, in an affectionate way. But that's in the past.

At my job interview yesterday I maintained eye-to-eye contact 90% of the time, because she would look to the side too anyway. It's kind of hard because I have trouble being serious.

Here's what you (all) can do for Job interviews. Instead of looking straight in their eyes - you can simply look at one of their ears. That way you don't feel uncomfortable/awkward feeling like you're trying to burn a hole into them or gazing at them longingly (like you're moments away from doing like these here :hug: ), and it's hard for them to tell if you're looking them in the eye or not.

touchthesky
27-05-10, 13:17
I have some for my Alice Cullen cosplay :-).

Might buy red ones if they announce a new born vampire party too.

So I like 'em!

Capt. Murphy
27-05-10, 13:28
I have some for my Alice Cullen cosplay :-).

Might buy red ones if they announce a new born vampire party too.

So I like 'em!

.....Wuh? :confused:

Tonyrobinson
27-05-10, 13:34
Even if I'm not intirely interested and singing Gaga in my head to block out what others are saying I still always use eye contact so they think I'm listening :vlol:

peeves
27-05-10, 13:50
I don't feel comfortable making eye contact even though in my former school there were a couple teachers that tried us to teach that. I'm a bit too bashful for that.

TR love
27-05-10, 13:59
I only feel uncomfortable with it once i realize im doing it. Its an automatic thing. But when i think about it too much i feel awkward.

Los Angeles
27-05-10, 14:00
There's only two people I'm perfectly fine with making it with, but for most other people if I do it for over a few seconds, I feel uncomfortable.

Your thoughts?

Same here. :(

AmericanAssassin
27-05-10, 14:08
It make me uncomfortable with almost everybody. Although, when I'm in a work environment, I make sure I do. It's the proper thing to do.

Tomb-Dude
27-05-10, 15:03
I can barely do it. I do try but sometimes I get uncomfortable. =/
Don't know why though, just nver really enjoyed staring into peoples eyes when talking to them >.> I tend to move my eyes around a bit or look at something different :D

remote91
27-05-10, 15:07
{eith;4627807']I always look people in the eye when speaking to them. It's just natural.
This.
Usually only if I'm sat down though

If we're walking side by side, I'd rather we both look where we're going :p

TRhalloween
27-05-10, 15:09
I have some for my Alice Cullen cosplay :-).

Might buy red ones if they announce a new born vampire party too.

So I like 'em!

You're thinking of eye contacts. Contacts for your eyes lol

Phantasmagoria
27-05-10, 17:25
I can't really make eye contact with other people, except for teachers and adult figures. I tend to break down in uncontrollable laughter when making eye contact with people my age.

Chocola teapot
27-05-10, 17:29
I will always make eye contact with people when talking to them properly.

Love2Raid
27-05-10, 17:30
Eye contact is extremely important when you are talking to someone. You can't really tell what someone is thinking when you don't make eye contact. Also, you can't make your point across when you are discussing with someone and you will appear shy or even uninterested/bored.

However, in some countries/cultures it may come across as rude when you constantly try to make eye contact with strangers/people from the opposite gender.

Veronica Ma
27-05-10, 17:42
---

cbragg09
27-05-10, 17:45
I make eye contact with everyone

But not everyone makes it back


So its whatever

Love2Raid
27-05-10, 18:07
Good question !!! It really depends where I am and what I'm doing. I rarely make eye contact when i'm say walking alone in the city.

But if i'm actually talking to someone, absolutely!! I think it would be rude NOT to make eye contact with someone you're actually speaking to. I also think its rude to talk to someone while wearing sunglasses and i always take them off when doing so, so I guess eye contact is very important to me. So is body language... but that's another thread. :D
I hate it too when people do that. :)

MinaFairbrook
27-05-10, 18:23
I do it when Im speaking to someone, trying to get someones attention, or flirting.
I dont just outright stare, theres a whole thing with eye contact depending on what reason Im doing it.
I think if Im speaking or listening to someone, its rude not to have eye contact. I might look away for a second or 2 so it doesnt get awkward.

Thrall
27-05-10, 18:26
I never really make eye contact with anyone, at least as far as I notice. Although with familiar people, I tend to look past their shoulder or over the top of their head.

FourBalls
27-05-10, 18:30
Eye contact is very important. It's hard for me to trust someone who's unwilling to make eye contact at least every once in a while when talking.

xcrushterx
27-05-10, 18:39
I'm only uncomfortable with making eye contact if I'm conscious of it. Most of the time I do it without noticing, but if I notice I'm doing it, I'll break it every five seconds or something.

Lemmie
27-05-10, 18:40
I can hold eye contact very well. I watch my tutors eyes all the time, if it makes them feel uncomfortable. It's sort of weird, in one tutorial group when everyone else is either looking at their books or out of the window and I'm looking right at the tutor...:o

I kind of like the sensation of giving someone 100% of my attention. :D Or appearing to.

tomblover
27-05-10, 18:50
I don't really like having eye contact with people, but I keep my eyes around the eyes of the person I'm talking to.

herothing
27-05-10, 18:54
I never liked looking into peoples eyes, i find it creepy...

Drone
27-05-10, 19:04
It is always good to look good people in the eye, you always see something good here. Opposite with idiots. You won't see a single thought in their eyes, only filth and stupidity, however I always look in the eye.

Liara
27-05-10, 19:30
I can't look in anyone's eyes now that I think about it. Not even my family. I'm not sure why...

xXhayleyroxXx
27-05-10, 19:39
It depends who it is! I dont usually look right in people's eyes when i talk to them -- which usually means I dont trust them or feel a bit uncomfortable talking to them, but Im like that with one of my friends for some reason. With my other friends, family members and boyfriends im cool with it.

HappyShannon
27-05-10, 19:42
I usually look people in the eyes unless it's a teacher :p

What I really hate though is walking past a teacher or someone I know and not knowing whether to look at them, how long to look at them, whether I should just keep my eyes on the floor... Ughh :pi:

xXhayleyroxXx
27-05-10, 19:44
I usually look people in the eyes unless it's a teacher :p

What I really hate though is walking past a teacher or someone I know and not knowing whether to look at them, how long to look at them, whether I should just keep my eyes on the floor... Ughh :pi:

or whether you should smile as well! arghhh :p

Phlip
27-05-10, 20:04
I usually look people in the eyes unless it's a teacher :p

That reminds me - another question would be, can you feel it when someone's staring at you?

Like in an exam when the invigilators walk by I could always feel their eyes on me.

Aranara
27-05-10, 20:05
That reminds me - another question would be, can you feel it when someone's staring at you?

Like in an exam when the invigilators walk by I could always feel their eyes on me.

Same here, but I ignore them and focus on what I have to do. :)

xXhayleyroxXx
27-05-10, 20:07
That reminds me - another question would be, can you feel it when someone's staring at you?

Like in an exam when the invigilators walk by I could always feel their eyes on me.

yeah i always know when people are staring at me :p Then again I have heightened sensitivity

touchthesky
27-05-10, 21:25
.....Wuh? :confused:

This thread is about contact lenses, no?

Gregori
27-05-10, 21:27
Eye contact is good :cool:

larafan25
27-05-10, 21:33
I cannot remember if I make eye contact, I am all over the place when talking to people, like putting on a 2 minute play really...:/

TRfan23
27-05-10, 21:53
This thread is about contact lenses, no?

Well I'm afraid not :o

More or less making eye contact towards people ;) You know looking at people in the eyes :)

Catracoth
27-05-10, 21:57
I always maintain eye contact during conversations out of respect and to show attentiveness, but my eyes always seem to water whenever I make eye contact with someone. Quite odd.

Love2Raid
27-05-10, 22:02
Maybe you forget to blink. ^_^

Hyper_Crazy
27-05-10, 22:24
I could only do eye contact with my friends, I was shy so :/ But that was about two years back. I can do eye contact with just about everyone now, regardless of if their my friends or if I know them.

Rai
27-05-10, 23:19
I always try to maintain eye-contact when I'm in conversation with someone. Obviously not the whole time as that is freaky, but enough so they know I'm actually listening and interested. There's nothing worse than someone's eyes roaming around the room whilst you're talking to them or staring at the floor - or anything that suggests their attention isn't really on you. If I'm nervous, say for a job interview or meeting someone new, I'll aim for a spot below their eyes, say their nose or their mouth so that it appears at least I'm looking at them. Then I'll catch their eye when I feel a little more relaxed.

To answer the question about if I can tell if I'm being stared at, yeah I generally can tell and it makes me feel uneasy.

(\/)ono
28-05-10, 00:57
I look people in the eye when I'm talking to them, but if it gets to a point where I'm explaining something or doing a long run-on sentence I turn straight ahead (if I'm sitting and the person I'm talking to is beside me) and talk with my hands. Kind of like a Sim with an invisible person in front. And if a person is talking to me, I have eye contact for a few seconds then I put my head down and listen, giving an occasional nod.

That is pretty much how I handle eye contact with friends. With people like teachers and stuff, I keep my head and my eyes faced away from them almost all the time. Not a very good impression, I know, but it's like my head is a magnet next to another of the same type. It just refuses to look at the person.

Total strangers I'll give eye contact, perhaps a shy smile and then I look down and away as fast as possible. :p

Shauni
28-05-10, 01:04
I make enough eye contact to stay polite, without staring I guess. I used to never make eye contact though, and people hated that! lol.

Also, this is odd, but if I am physically close to where someone is standing while talking, I make less eye contact then if they are farther away. I guess close + eye contact = too personal. lol.

Andyroo
28-05-10, 04:57
Also, this is odd, but if I am physically close to where someone is standing while talking, I make less eye contact then if they are farther away. I guess close + eye contact = too personal. lol.

+1, if I'm talking to someone that's really close, directly in front of me or like when sitting next to me back when I was in school, I'll barely even look at them, only in their general direction.

And eye-contact at that range, for me, is very personal, so I'd never do it unless it was someone I was in a relationship with or a best friend.

just*raidin*tomb
28-05-10, 05:18
Its hard for me to make eye-contact with anyone I'm not comfortable with. If I don't know you, its kinda of awkward. I manage to coax myself to do it most of the time though. And if I completely despise you, I will give you a death stare. O`_'O