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in_tux
11-09-05, 06:44
PROLOGUE

Lightning, paralleled by thunder, emitted a transient luminosity throughout the obscurity of the night, and then there was a mild cloudburst.

A woman in her late twenty’s rushed to the opened windows and shut them to confine herself from inconvenience. She then sighed in relief. Her long brunette tresses were still wet after a night’s bath and she wore nothing but a fresh fragrant towel around her body. She set her brown eyes on an opulent wooden cupboard where her luxurious garments among other things were stored, opened a drawer and withdrew a simple white nightgown made of silk and put it atop a cozy divan.

A pleasant scent of lavender was present within the room, and only a vintage oil lamp served radiance amidst the area’s considerable darkness. She walked towards an unlit fireplace accessorized with small foreign artifacts and numerous glass figurines, and knelt down to ignite the chunked pieces of firewood placed underneath. The fireplace after a while lit up the room, although only faintly, and engendered warmth within the area.

A classical musical score started playing while she disrobed the fabric wrapped around her and subsequently dressed up in the white nightgown she readied. Her sleek skin gleamed ruby from the light radiating from the fireplace. She reached for a comb from a small table placed just below a mirror hanging on the wall and began grooming herself by untangling the strands of her brunette locks, looking at her reflection.

Three knocks on the door caught her attention. A man in his early seventy’s who stands more than a foot smaller than her cast a shadow on the carpeted floor from the bright light bore by the enormous chandelier outside the room. The man wore formal attire and had a slight hump on his back.

“Dinner is served, Lady Croft,” said the man.

“Thank you, Winston. I will follow,” said Lara with a pleasant beam on her face.

Lara went down to the dining area where Winston awaited her in case of any necessary assistance needed by the one and only daughter of Lord Henshingly Croft. Winston pulled back Lara’s chair in assist and gestured his hand for the lady to take the seat. Lara properly and womanly sat down on the precious chair in appropriate compliance. In accordance with his duty as a butler, Winston put the piece of cloth used for formal dining on Lara’s lap and filled a glass with fresh water as preferred by his mistress. Before the chivalrous butler could take the covers off of the silver dishwares that contained the cuisines, Lara held his hand and asked him, “Have you eaten your supper?”

“After you, Lady Croft,” he said, appearing to be shrewd.

“Join me, please,” said Lara, wearing a slight smile.

“Only if I must, but I do not think that it is of necessity, Lady Croft,” Winston replied, smiling at his mistress.

“Oh, come on,” averred Lara. She stood from her chair and pulled back another that was adjacent to her position at the dining table. “Please, Winston. Sit.”

“If you insist, my lady,” said Winston, finally joining Lara for supper.

It has been long since the last time Lara had dinner at the Croft Manor. She had been away for more than three quarters for an expedition in the Philippines, retrieving the infamous Yama****a Treasure which has earned her an enormous fortune, a quarter of which was donated to an orphanage in the Philippines where she stayed for a month.

Winston and Lara were talking about the orphanage while eating their meal. Everything went fine and they had a sensible conversation, one that the butler had none for the past nine months. One would not think that Lara was a mistress to the clever Winston.

“I can see you are finished eating, my lady. Allow me to help you with those,” articulated Winston primly, pertaining to Lara’s dishes.

“Oh, yes, please,” said Lara.

“Excuse me,” said Winston as he stood from the dining table. He carried with him his and Lara’s dishes, heading to the kitchen, excusing himself from Lara.

Lara was climbing up the grand staircase to the library when the doorbell rang. It had caught her attention; it was highly unusual for them to be receiving visitors, especially at that time, when the night sported pouring rain.

“I will attend to it,” said Winston, after having gone to the kitchen. Winston brought with him a black umbrella to the ostentatious entrance gate of the lavish manor. Upon seeing that the figure from outside the gate had no cover from the downpour, Winston rushed, splashing water on the pavement to the gateway.

“Uncle Winston!” shouted a manly voice. At that instant, the butler recognized who it was, and he excitedly hastened more to the massive gate.

Winston unbolted the entrance, and let in the man. “I was not expecting you this soon, young man,” said Winston, sharing his shade to the man wearing a jacket, many thickly layered garments, burdened by a loaded bag on his right shoulder. “Come now, I will introduce you to Lady Croft.”
_________________________________________________

I would like to hear your comments regarding my writing. They'd be really appreciated. http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/smile.gif

Chapter 1 is currently under works.

I was wondering if you guys could shed me some ideas on how I could develop the new male character's personality, traits and such.

Suggestions such as:
> his name
> his way of interacting with Lara
> his role in Lara's life
> his motive
> his background

... would be greatly appreciated!

Thank you. :D

http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/smile.gif http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/wave.gif

in_tux

[ 14. September 2005, 11:57: Message edited by: in_tux ]

thomas.smith.503
11-09-05, 10:33
>his name: Harry Trecastle
>his way of interacting with Lara: perhaps at first he could be slightly arrogant, in his self assured knowledge that he is an excellent Tomb Raider, warms to Lara later on an adventure.
>his role in Lara's life: accompanies Lara on an adventure (or vice-versa, whichever way you want to look at it).
>his motive: needs help recovering an artifact etc, but won't admit the fact that he needs her help, tries to get her to come without showing his weaknesses, or seeming dependent.
>his background: estranged from his parents (like Lara was), only in contact with uncle Winston, who has advised him to contact Lara regarding his planned adventure.


in_tux, I really enjoyed reading your prologue, it looks like your story will turn out great!

Chapter 1 is currently under works. - Tell me about it! I'm currently working on the second chapter of my fanfic.

Good Luck! http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/wave.gif

in_tux
11-09-05, 12:55
Originally posted by Mantell:
>his name: Harry Trecastle
>his way of interacting with Lara: perhaps at first he could be slightly arrogant, in his self assured knowledge that he is an excellent Tomb Raider, warms to Lara later on an adventure.
>his role in Lara's life: accompanies Lara on an adventure (or vice-versa, whichever way you want to look at it).
>his motive: needs help recovering an artifact etc, but won't admit the fact that he needs her help, tries to get her to come without showing his weaknesses, or seeming dependent.
>his background: estranged from his parents (like Lara was), only in contact with uncle Winston, who has advised him to contact Lara regarding his planned adventure.


in_tux, I really enjoyed reading your prologue, it looks like your story will turn out great!

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr /> Chapter 1 is currently under works. - Tell me about it! I'm currently working on the second chapter of my fanfic.

Good Luck! http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/wave.gif </font>[/QUOTE]Thank you very much, Mantell. Your suggestions, for me, are quite cliche (if you know what I mean) but nonetheless really great!

To be quite honest, Chapter 1 won't have its main plot unless the new male character is fully conceived. :D

Good luck on your fan-fic too, Mantell! http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/thumb.gif

http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/smile.gif http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/wave.gif

in_tux