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JamesFKirk
24-10-05, 15:16
This is something (among a large number of others) I begun writing some time ago. Just want to know whether it's worth continuing or not... I leave the choice to you. It was supposed to be a prequel for "Return from Egypt", something else that I was working on.

This was it. The final fall. The pit of eternal darkness opened below her. Her hands were unable to hold her on its edge, not anymore. Now... Her hands slipped. She didn’t scream. She knew this moment would come. The darkness welcomed her, embraced her body, and penetrated her mind.
Then, in a sudden and brief moment, a strange force brought her back. The pit wasn’t nearly as bottomless as she thought it might be. A loud shout sounded through her mind.
“Run, girl, run!”
She didn’t know how or why but she did it. Within less then a heartbeat she was outside the pit, in another, almost unlit room. Loud noise and dust cloud emerged from behind her. The rubble that falling from the former way out of the pyramid fell on the ground.
“You truly are a survivor.”
She grabbed a flare from her backpack.
“Let there be light...”
And there was light and Lara saw it was good. The room was stable, at least for the moment.
“Something’s not right here... I should be dead or broken and dying... The room should be crumbling, debris all over the place...”
“That is right, Lady Croft.”
“Where’s that voice coming from?”
She looked everywhere it was possible. Yet she saw only walls, pictographs on the walls – but no one else around.
“You cannot see me. Don’t try to. It’s irrelevant.”
“Yes... Resistance is futile,” Lara smiled to herself ironically.
“However you call it. You must survive. It’s your task.”
“Who the hell are you to tell me what’s my task?” Lara shouted to the empty place around her. “Ancient god? Immortal sorcerer? A freak with speaking tube?”
“Run.”
“WHAT?”
“Run, or you die here.”
“ What choice do I have? I run...”
And so she did. As the voice disappeared, so did the rooms stability.
“Run...”
“Faster.”
Her breath was clouded with dust, falling from upwards.
“Who the hell are you?”
Her legs did enormous job. She never thought that speed was within her abilities.
“You cannot speak my name. Your votial organ is incapable of doing so. You may think of me... Bruce Wayne maybe would be suitful.”
Her footsteps echoed like symphony on the background cacophony of falling rubble.
“Well, Batman... Is there a reason for you to save me or is it just your pittiness over a lesser creature?”
“You will be told later. Now make haste. Safety is not distant.”
“Is it? I’m no god...”
“That indeed can be changed. In time.”
Were it not for the falling stones Lara would stop.
“What the hell do you mean by that?”
“There will be time for questions later. Run.”
A minute later she finally saw it. Exit from collapsing monument.
“Stop.”
“Why now?” Lara shouted. “The exit is just…” And then she gave it a second thought. “Is too unstable, am I right?”
“Exactly. Turn right and push the wall as hard as you can.”
“And there’s gonna be what?” Lara did as she was told. The wall was massive but it did move. Slowly.
“Temporary shelter.”

[ 24. October 2005, 16:26: Message edited by: JamesFKirk ]

xMiSsCrOfTx
24-10-05, 15:32
That's really good! Definitely worth continuing! http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/thumb.gif

Crafting Lara Croft
24-10-05, 17:41
Very interesting! I also would like to know how the story continues...

Anubis_AF
24-10-05, 17:57
Great writing http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/thumb.gif

JamesFKirk
27-10-05, 14:40
A little addition (wasn't able to write more during workhours :D )

“Tempor…!” Lara didn’t finish the sentence as the wall broke up. She fell in, immediately hitting the floor.
“Now you could have told me about this…”
“Raise. You are not there yet.”
“I noticed!” She made another few steps and then fell into darkness.
“Is this the shelter you were talking about?” she shouted.
“It is close. Try to fall on to your feet.”
“Wha…?”
A loud splash filled the surrounding area. Lara realized that she submerged several feet beneath the surface after a momentarily shock. Several moves and Lara reached the air. She tried to see at least something but there was no light.
“Right, caped crusader. Is there anything else you want to tell me?”
“Several meters to your left there is a safe shore. For the moment.”
“All right…” A close shore sounded good… only the thought that she might have as well landed on it instead in the water made her a little nervous. Somebody or something was either toying with her or knowing very well what him or it was doing. Either way it was a really dangerous game. Not that kind of dangerous game she was used to.
“I’m here. Anything else?”
“Sit and relax. This place is safe until the monument completely collapses. Then you will have to leave. Rest now.”

Sofitegan
28-10-05, 17:03
ace!

JamesFKirk
30-10-05, 21:30
I'm sorry I won't post much in close time. I'm just sick but sitting at the PC makes my head hurt much after about an half an hour. Like there's anyone waiting for anything there :D

thesmallprint
30-10-05, 21:44
Excellent http://www.tombraiderforums.com/images/smilies/thumb.gif