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nightmanre1414
20-03-06, 23:55
Hello all...
Exactly 5 years today, we learnt the news that my father had depression - the worst case they had seen in Saskatchewan (Canada). My mother felt heartbroken more than either of us (my brother, sister and me). We thought it was just because she was married to our wonderful, father. But it turned out to be worse. A year later she spilt the news. She had depression, too. I went flying to my room, crying. I couldn't stop for days, maybe weeks. My father's on twelve pills. My mother's on 3. It's been like this for 5/4 years. My father can't think of anything happy, and he has to use this one C-Pat machine, to help him sleep. He could die in his sleep without it, from breathing problems. The machine is/was so loud, it sounded like a fighter jet. They are/were both very crabby and emotional. They get mad easily, and break down easily. Some days it's just too much to handle. They are keeping secrets from each other and us. They don't talk at all. It's so lonely and quiet here. Some days it's like either one of them don't want to live and they talk about how they would like to die and how their funeral will be like. It's very hard for all of us. Some days it's hard to keep happy. I get worried. You have no idea what it's like to have your parents saying they would like to die all the time. "No, Sam. It would be so easy to jump off a bridge in front of a bus".

I guess all I'm requesting from you at your safe, warm welcoming homes, is some support. It's very hard altogether... we don't have much money, either. But that doesn't matter....

Thanks for listening!
Sam~* :( :( :( :( :( :(

CerebralAssassin
21-03-06, 00:06
I've had some family issues myself,but not like yours..how old are you BTW?

stereopathic
21-03-06, 00:11
i can't say how sorry i am to hear this, sam. i have struggled with depression every day of the last nine years of my life and i can safely say that there is no pain quite like it. many times, those that are around me don't understand the ailment and react with anger. it's good that you have a solid understanding of what they are going through even though it's sounds very difficult for you. if you have access to a school counselor or another trained professional it would be a good idea to talk to them. they are people who chose the profession because they like to listen and like to help. a lot of times it will help you cope from day to day just to express how you feel. we're all here for you, too. remember that, okay? take care.

DREWY
21-03-06, 00:27
This is a major problem worldwide and also one of the least understood. I really feel for you.
No, Sam. It would be so easy to jump off a bridge in front of a bus This doesn't solve anything except to make the people left behind's life harder. As steropathic ^ says, find someone to listen

Megalith
21-03-06, 07:05
Oh God...i'm very sorry to hear this.
I just want you to know that almost every family has problems.Some have really serious ones just like you.The last 2-3 years i had also some big problems in my family.The only thing i advise you to do is try to look at things more optimistic.I know it's very hard at the moment but we cannot abandon hope.Sometimes it's all we have.
I'm with you in this one 100%,don't feel alone.
And remember,from my personal experience,when you think positive there always comes a solution to any problem.Be an example to your parents!

Sin
21-03-06, 08:35
well... Depression it is really a bad thing.
I am myself with a depression, it started 3 months ago, and now I can only be "fine" (because with the depression itīs hard to be happy), with 5 pills for day, and my depression started when I was 15 yers old, now Iīm 16, I had made it in 19 of February.
Itīs hard to explain what people with depression feel...
Yeah, the truth is that I wanted, and some times now, I wished to die.
In the first month with my depression my parents didenīt wanted to left me alone in home, because I said to them that my wish is go to the kitchen, pick up a knife and cut myself.
The firsts moments were really difficult. Not only for me, but it was hard to for the people around me.
many times in School I cryed with the teachers.
Now I feel a bit better, but I know that this is a long Journy, and a big batlle too, that the only chance to win is that we know the we cold pass this hard moment and better moments will came.

Lara Lover
21-03-06, 08:38
Aww, Sorry to hear that Sam. :hug: :( I hope you're mum and dad and you get better very very soon.

We're all here to help you.

Greenkey2
21-03-06, 08:42
I cannot express how much I feel for you :(. My dad has suffered from it for 14 years, and the knock-on effect has resulted in both my mum and myself being burdened with our own depression. We are all on various medications. We have had and/or are receiving counselling of one sort or another.

My dad also uses a CPAP machine! It helps, but only so much. He can be fine for a while, but then something totally unexpected comes along and triggers his depression again and it becomes very difficult to cope with.

I hope that things improve for your family, even though we both know it will take a very long time. PM or Skype me at anytiime to talk if you need someone there :hug:

angelika
21-03-06, 08:53
Oh dear. This is very sad. :hug:
(and I think I have problems.....)
I don't know how to deal with this kind of situation. Do you consider getting any professional help about it?
What do your parents' doctor say?

jaywalker
21-03-06, 09:11
When i get depressed which is quite often recently. i just work more, get my head down and focus on working.

Lara Lover
21-03-06, 09:11
Yea, Jaywalker you must have a stressful life.

Hope everything will ease down abit after Legend is released.

highonlollypops
21-03-06, 09:15
you could try family therapy - or reading self-help books

jaywalker
21-03-06, 09:21
Yea, Jaywalker you must have a stressful life.

Hope everything will ease down abit after Legend is released.

after legend, its straight into the next set of titles

Tramp
21-03-06, 09:23
Sam there are lots of us here who know what you are going through. I myself have suffered from depression for many years and I know how difficult this illness is. It is also probably the most misunderstood illness of all. Unlike the common belief that it is a mental illness it is a very real physical illness caused by a chemical imbalance.

I fought my way off anti-depressants last year as I was so tired of the awful side effects one of which is suicidal thoughts. It's hard to tell which is worse the disease or the side effects of the medication.

You definitely need counselling even if it is just for someone to talk to who understands. Are your parent receiving counselling. If not it would be good if they could be convinced to look into it. If you are seeing the same doctor as your parents and can get to talk to him/her alone tell them what you are going through. Not only could it help you but it may enable them to treat your parents in a better way.

If you need someone to talk to I'm sure that most people who have responded to this thread would be more than happy for you to PM them. I would.

I really hope that things start to improve for you but knowing this illness like I do I know it is going to be a long hard fight.

Lara Lover
21-03-06, 09:24
after legend, its straight into the next set of titles

Wow, Jay. That must be very hard working.

:hug:

nightmanre1414
21-03-06, 21:44
Gosh!
Thanks for replying. Greenkey, your dad uses the C-Pat machine, too?? Sometimes you feel like you're the only dealing with this. It's very hard. Very saddening. But now I know I have people out there who are willing to help me. :D Thanks! :hug:

taika
21-03-06, 21:52
Make sure you have someone by your side, someone you can talk to. Someone you trust. A teacher, a councilor, maybe even speak with your brothers and sisters. It might help sort your mind out. If this doesn't work you can try and clear your mind.
Concentrate hard on your school work (I know it sounds silly... but keep focused on school, you want to do well)

nightmanre1414
21-03-06, 22:00
It's hard... I used to be a straight-A student... I swear, nothing else but A's... now I'm failing a whole bunch of classes. It's SO stressful...
My parents just want me to be happy, but it's so hard... :(

Thorn
21-03-06, 22:04
I've been battling body dismorphia my whole life so I'm familiar with depression.

nightmanre1414
21-03-06, 22:10
Really?
Wow.... how bad was your case?
If it's too personal, I won't ask, 'cause I know how it feels. I wanted to talk about this since I started on the forum. I finally got the courage to talk. :P

Yunaīs Wish
22-03-06, 01:58
Iīve just read this! Feel free to talk about this in the forums. You too Sin. Talking about what you feel leads to many possible solutions and answers. Donīt let it win. Fight it. Even though I have never been depressed, I firmly think that it can be stopped, but itīs up to the person, really. Whenever you have problems, talk about them...otherwise, the burden will be too heavy. Weīre here in order to help you and support you:hug:

Draco
22-03-06, 02:07
I used to get depressed...

But I didn't see the point and just stopped.

Capt. Murphy
22-03-06, 02:40
I've been 'diagnosed' as possibly having mild depression. There are somedays I feel way down.:( Then the next day I'll be on cloud... 9 or 10 or whatever. :jmp: It's wierd. It always seems to happen in that pattern too. If one day I'm feeling blue I will say to myself "Ahh. Tomorrow I'll just be loopy with giddyness. So no worries." :cln: Maybe it's some kind of mood swings or maybe I'm unballanced... in the head I mean. :pi:

:D

Melonie Tomb Raider
22-03-06, 03:49
I go through the exact same thing Murphy! Sometimes it's different though. I'll be depressed for about a week or so, then happy for another week or so. Most of the time for no substantial reason. If I'm ever depressed nobody ever knows it though, because I always put on a happy face, whether I really am happy or not. I don't want peopel to get upset just because of me. Right now I'm really happy though. :D For real. :p

Kiss-Bite
22-03-06, 04:58
Well, it seems people can have true empathy here, so one doesn't need to feel alone.:hug:

mmm...cookies
22-03-06, 05:10
omg murphy i have the exact same thing. Today is loopy day weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Jon A
22-03-06, 05:37
I don't get depressed often, but when I do, I usually try to do something that I enjoy. Like when I'm feeling really overwhelmed and bogged down and like things just can't go on, I play with the level editor a little... that always calms me some. However, if something really bad happens, I just sit there and cry, and don't do anything for a couple of days.

About eight years ago one of my family members (can't say which one) attempted suicide. They would've been successful too, but the police arrived to take them to the hospital where their stomach was pumped. I remember how the whole incident went down, with everyone screaming and all. And I remember the police cars swinging into the driveway with the ambulance close behind. The day after, I thought it was a dream, but soon realized it wasn't. I was in fourth grade when that happened.

I was also tested for ADD once, but that's another story for another time.




Jon

scoopy_loopy
22-03-06, 05:49
Sam Im really sorry to hear this, I can relate. One of my parents is always saying that they should go kill themselves and all this....


it is sad, but you have it alot worse, and I think you should definently talk to school counscellor they do try to help.


How ironic! In this thread I had an advert for a depression website appear :)

Shark_Blade
22-03-06, 08:47
I used to have depression in my childhood. I can tell those experiences you're having is horrible. Mix up with people, it's true like some people in this forum said:find some one to talk to.you can't bottle up everything inside you.that's not the healthy way to live. I learn that the hard way.No matter how hard life is, stand tall and be happy. U can always pm me or anybody in this forum. We are here for u.:)

Greenkey2
22-03-06, 08:50
I used to get depressed...

But I didn't see the point and just stopped.


I'm sorry Draco, but whether you meant that to be funny or not; as a sufferer of and carer to people with clinical depression your comments seemed very insensitive.

That's the point; if you have the genuine illness laughably labelled "depression" you CAN'T "just stop".

Thorn
22-03-06, 12:36
I'm sorry Draco, but whether you meant that to be funny or not; as a sufferer of and carer to people with clinical depression your comments seemed very insensitive.

That's the point; if you have the genuine illness laughably labelled "depression" you CAN'T "just stop".
Exactly. People with clinical depression have a chemical imbalance that they can't just get rid of in case you didn't know.

deepbluesea
22-03-06, 12:49
I have a severe case of manic depression, I was asked to leave my job because of it, which didn't help, I'm on 8 pills a day 2 of those are anti psychotics and the other 6 are mood stablisers, i also have agrophobia, so if you ever need to ask anyone anything about it please PM me, I'll answer whatever I can.

That applies to anyone, sometimes it's a bit hard to explain but i'm sure other people know what i'm talking about. And it's not something you can just get over i've been battling it most of my life.

sometimes I can be on a high and I feel like I love everything and everyone I can do anything, the down side with this is that I take dangerous risks (which is why I don't drive) and I can't control how high I get it's worse than being drunk.
Sometimes I can be on a low and I'll feel like noone understands, my head gets muddled and i can't control my thoughts ( I need to have someone around when I get like that) and I'll do anything to stop the pain.

I've been told that's it's a chemical imbalance and that I inherited it from my mother (she had it too) but it's more than that as I haven't found the right combination of medication and believe me I've tried alot.

Anyone one else want any info just ask and I'll be happy to talk to you :hug:

Laras Backpack
22-03-06, 12:58
Nightmarre1414 and deepbluesea: you have my sympathy and support. :hug: :hug:
My mum has had clinical depression from an early age and we've had it quite hard as a family (particularly when my step dad abandoned us). In recent years she has been able to overcome it largely through her faith. But a month ago she had a relapse and was taken to a psychiatric ward. I got a phone call at uni and I had to travel back home to help my brother. We're both in our teens but it was really scary for us. She's much better now but she's still having a stressful time.

deepbluesea
22-03-06, 13:00
I was in a psychiatic ward and it was really helpful me knowing that there was someone there when I couldn't control myself

Thorn
22-03-06, 13:11
People automatically think you're a freak or serial killer if you've been to a psychiatic hospital. Proves how little they know.

deepbluesea
22-03-06, 13:16
People automatically think you're a freak or serial killer if you've been to a psychiatic hospital. Proves how little they know.

It's just a safe place for poeple with problems to go and if poeple think i'm a freak thats their choice, as for serial killer can't remember killing anyone but who knows :D