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View Full Version : List of things Lara Croft doesn't do that she should (e.g. go to the loo)


bianca__croft
16-04-06, 11:04
I was just thinking, in the game Lara Croft doesn't:

1) Eat
2) Sleep
3) Go to the loo
4) Go out (she has NO social life. No phones calls - ever!)
5) RELAX

She is SUPERWOMAN if she can go through life without all this lol!

CuteKittenlol
16-04-06, 11:07
She doen't brush her teeth either!!!!!!!!
Or have a shower
errrrrrrrrrrrrr dirty girl lol :D :jmp:

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 11:13
Yeah not that either......anything else??

viper456
16-04-06, 11:22
SEX

someone had to say it.. lmao

Lara Croft Fan Joe
16-04-06, 11:23
She does have a social life, she just doesnt use a phone, she doesnt... well I can think of a few, but its not really appropriate for this forum:mis:

nach0
16-04-06, 11:24
Get Scared
Have bad hair days
Get dirty (subsequently no showers!)

Teeheehee

viper456
16-04-06, 11:24
She does have a social life, she just doesnt use a phone, she doesnt... well I can think of a few, but its not really appropriate for this forum:mis:

dont be a spoil sport :mad:

viper456
16-04-06, 11:25
Get Scared
Have bad hair days
Get dirty (subsequently no showers!)

Teeheehee

lara does get dirty, in legend if you roll around abit shes covered! lol

Lara Croft Fan Joe
16-04-06, 11:25
SEX

someone had to say it.. lmao
Yep, but i had an even better one, its realli wrong tho:D no way i'm gonna post it...

James_Croft
16-04-06, 11:27
Lara took a shower once in Tomb Raider 2! :)

viper456
16-04-06, 11:27
Yep, but i had an even better one, its realli wrong tho:D no way i'm gonna post it...

dooooo it! lol

Uapa
16-04-06, 11:28
Get dirty (subsequently no showers!)

Teeheehee
She don't need showers she have a pool :):p

Thorir
16-04-06, 11:29
Shopping! :D
She has lots of money, and I want to use them.:cln:

TR8 should have an option to collect money and then go out in London and shop for clothing and equipment. http://www.trle-community.net/images/smiles/pleased.gif

Lara Croft Fan Joe
16-04-06, 11:29
i agree she has no sex life, NO SEX FOR LARA:D

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 11:30
HA HA yeah!!! Maybe it would be better to earn points rather than outfits, so then you could CHOOSE the outfits you get. and also, what is the 'wrong' one. say it!!!

viper456
16-04-06, 11:30
eh? I wasnt being a spoil sport:confused: i agree she has no sex life, NO SEX FOR LARA:D

aaaah thought you were saying the thread wasnt appropriate hehehehehe :tea:

Lara Croft Fan Joe
16-04-06, 11:31
dooooo it! lol
Ok, but ill have to keep it vauge.., she doesnt pleasurise herself:D

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 11:33
LOL I thought it would be something like that! Well maybe she is a nun. A sort of ninja nun. That kills people. Ok maybe not...

viper456
16-04-06, 11:33
Ok, but ill have to keep it vauge.., she doesnt pleasurise herself:D

lmao dunno like! why would zip have those webcams in her room ? lmao

Lara Croft Fan Joe
16-04-06, 11:36
lmao dunno like! why would zip have those webcams in her room ? lmao
Omg:vlol: I bet he gets dirrrty vids of her and posts them over the internet:D :cln:

Cochrane
16-04-06, 11:38
- She doesn't get any medical treatment, except for what she can do herself with the contents of a small bag even when people shoot at her
- She doesn't need to find a way to store huge amounts of large masks, crosses, bubbles and so on, even though they're made out of heavy alloys/metals
- She doesn't need to find the keys for any vehicle she finds, and they're always fully fueled
- She cannot ever leave her own house to do anything normal, besides tomb raiding

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 11:38
I'm not saying Zip - I'm saying its Alistair!!!!
It's always the quiet ones...lol

Uapa
16-04-06, 11:41
i agree she has no sex life, NO SEX FOR LARA:D
hmm mayby she don't found the right men yet :)

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 11:42
What??? With those boobs?? LOL

Lara Croft Fan Joe
16-04-06, 11:44
hmm mayby she don't found the right men yet :)
Maybe... but i dont think anyone can match up to lara, maybe kurtis, but he died long ago:D

viper456
16-04-06, 11:45
Maybe... but i dont think anyone can match up to lara, maybe kurtis, but he died long ago:D

i hope he did :D lol

Lara Croft Fan Joe
16-04-06, 11:54
Lara doest need a man!, she has a *****tor:D:D:D

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 11:56
What about Zip? Maybe in TR8 they have an affair LOL

viper456
16-04-06, 12:02
What about Zip? Maybe in TR8 they have an affair LOL

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww lmao

MiCkiZ88
16-04-06, 12:03
I'd like to see lara dressing up when she changes outfits :p

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 12:03
or alistair lol!!!

viper456
16-04-06, 12:04
I'd like to see lara dressing up when she changes outfits :p

:O do you want the link to Zip's web cams?

dirty person :P lmao

or alistair lol!!!

TO FAR!!! WAAAAY TO FAR lmao

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 12:04
Yep, in another thread some poeple said about making a skin that had no clothes on. Dear me....

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 12:07
TO FAR!!! WAAAAY TO FAR lmao

I'm guessing i shouldnt mention Winston...JOKING!!!!!

BtoFu
16-04-06, 12:30
Yep, in another thread some poeple said about making a skin that had no clothes on. Dear me....

That's called 'catering to public demand' :vlol:

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 12:32
That's called 'catering to public demand' :vlol:
NO it's called catering the the male public demand lol

CardinalXimenez
16-04-06, 12:34
NO it's called catering the the male public demand lol

And certain females, at least I know a bunch of female TR fans who have the hots for Lara.

BtoFu
16-04-06, 12:37
I wonder if Crystal Dynamics would ever do it..it's not their legacy since they've only made one game and I'm sure it would boost sales if word got around - you know it would.

Well I'll just stop my wishful thinking..:whi: :

viper456
16-04-06, 13:00
NO it's called catering the the male public demand lol

fiiiine, you can have naked winston instead :p lmao

Dojomann
16-04-06, 13:06
It does seem weird. One woman and three men in one biiiig house. Nothing happens? Yea, right.

LegenDarY
16-04-06, 13:08
I was just thinking, in the game Lara Croft doesn't:

1) Eat
2) Sleep
3) Go to the loo
4) Go out (she has NO social life. No phones calls - ever!)
5) RELAX

She is SUPERWOMAN if she can go through life without all this lol!

lol this isn't the sims.. it's tomb raider..;)

BtoFu
16-04-06, 13:34
Hunting for food a la Snake Eater..well I think it would have been pretty groovy see Lara with a bloody face after chomping on a Jaguar she's just capped! :jmp:

Anubis_AF
16-04-06, 13:42
Moved.

Muhammad
16-04-06, 13:48
Lara's quote from TR2 says it all:

"Don't you think you've seen enough!" *bang*

Kamrusepas
16-04-06, 13:51
She never brushes her hair...

navinloveslara
16-04-06, 13:53
Omg:vlol: I bet he gets dirrrty vids of her and posts them over the internet:D :cln:

:vlol::vlol::vlol::vlol::vlol::vlol::vlol::vlol::v lol::vlol:

navinloveslara
16-04-06, 13:54
Hunting for food a la Snake Eater..well I think it would have been pretty groovy see Lara with a bloody face after chomping on a Jaguar she's just capped! :jmp:

Tomb Raider is NOT a gore fest. It isn't Resident Evil. ( I love Resident Evil!!!)

jarhead
16-04-06, 13:55
ive never seen her tie her shoelases

BtoFu
16-04-06, 14:08
Tomb Raider is NOT a gore fest. It isn't Resident Evil. ( I love Resident Evil!!!)

I didn't say it was a gorefest nor was I implying that it should be. Metal Gear isn't and they have Snake eating animals.

jarhead
16-04-06, 14:10
she never seems to parade round tescos in cavemen clothing and go 'Yes Yes YES!!!' whilst in the shower.

Laras_Eyes
16-04-06, 14:56
She never bleed, exept for the game tr AOD?
she never used any swear words,
she never rests?
She doesn't fall in love? :confused:
she never eats or drinks?

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 15:01
she never used any swear words

LOL yeah. I guess she can't being LADY croft lol

Lavinder
16-04-06, 15:05
She never bleed, exept for the game tr AOD?
she never used any swear words,
she never rests?
She doesn't fall in love? :confused:
she never eats or drinks?
She use to have blood fly off her in the old games.
She says "bloody"
She fell in love with the ruins on Legend.
She eats chocolate bars in AOD and lucozade on the advert.

CardinalXimenez
16-04-06, 15:06
she never used any swear words,
she never rests? she never eats or drinks?

Actually sheīs done those three things, she used various bleeped-out words in an AOD interview (still canīt believe they allowed her to use such words, even if it was for comical effect), and she says "bloody" a couple of times in Legend, which I guess counts as swearing. In a cutscene in TR1 she rests on Natlas boat, and in a cutscene in TR3 she kicks back with a drink while sitting in a truck.

Natla'd
16-04-06, 15:08
she never seems to parade round tescos in cavemen clothing and go 'Yes Yes YES!!!' whilst in the shower.

LOL, unlike the rest of us? ;)

Lara Croft doesn't seem to have...*ahem*...a normal, womanly cycle. I mean, who would want to raid a tomb while they're on? :mis:

JasonDavies15
16-04-06, 15:08
i agree she has no sex life, NO SEX FOR LARA:D

No Sex -> No Children!

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 15:17
and your point is...?

CardinalXimenez
16-04-06, 15:29
LOL, unlike the rest of us? ;)

Lara Croft doesn't seem to have...*ahem*...a normal, womanly cycle. I mean, who would want to raid a tomb while they're on? :mis:

Well, maybe she just has a good sanitation pad.

Imagine Lara advertising a sanitation pad: "When you lead a life like mine, you want a pad that doesnīt hinder your movements. Thatīs why I use Femi-9, the bodyadapting shape lets me do roundhouse kicks and backflips no problem, and the new, superabsorbant pad ensures that the only bloodstains on my clothes will be from my opponents."

bianca__croft
16-04-06, 15:44
LOL! :D :D :D

CuteKittenlol
16-04-06, 16:01
lol :D :D lol

Greenkey2
16-04-06, 16:01
She never bites her nails.

She never watches Eastenders/Coronation Street/Neighbours.

She never forgets to put on fresh underwear for every new adventure (it'd be a good deterrant against panther attacks though, if she DIDN'T :pi:)

She never giggles hysterically and runs around saying "Shoes! Must buy shoes!" or "Darling you look simply fabulous, where did you get that dress?" or "Oh dear, what have I stepped in?"


BTW she doesn't actually have to do any of these; it's just a list of things she would never do :D

jarhead
16-04-06, 16:18
off all the places she ran through and all the creatures shes near- shes never managed to step in any 'waste'. she never shaves either. massive gorilla face.

Natla'd
16-04-06, 18:10
Well, maybe she just has a good sanitation pad.

Imagine Lara advertising a sanitation pad: "When you lead a life like mine, you want a pad that doesnīt hinder your movements. Thatīs why I use Femi-9, the bodyadapting shape lets me do roundhouse kicks and backflips no problem, and the new, superabsorbant pad ensures that the only bloodstains on my clothes will be from my opponents."

LMAO - you're on to something there. ;)

CerebralAssassin
16-04-06, 19:42
return her blockbuster movies on time..

Zip
16-04-06, 19:57
lmao dunno like! why would zip have those webcams in her room ? lmao


Must agree thats v odd i think i will look on the net see if i find anything

Jebus
17-04-06, 08:37
She use to have blood fly off her in the old games.
She says "bloody"
She fell in love with the ruins on Legend.
She eats chocolate bars in AOD and lucozade on the advert.

You are a true fan for noticing all of that!!! thats dedication lol

Lucy_Croft
17-04-06, 09:19
Lara could take 5mg norethisterone tablets to stop her cycle, and postpone it for as long as she wants. People going on treks/hiking use them.
She can also take stuff to plug her bowels up so she doesn't need to relieve herself.
Lara is a pill-popper, OMG!
lol. I think she and Zip should fall in lurrrrve. Although personally I thought the only guy for her was Chase (he was in the comics) but he bit the dust...

bianca__croft
17-04-06, 11:02
Well a little earlier people mentioned how strange it was that she lives in a house with 3 other men and NOTHING HAPPENS. LOL.

rachkitten
17-04-06, 11:13
Lmao :vlol: :D

jarhead
17-04-06, 11:15
ewwwwwww- 3 other men. zip, alistar and WINSTON. yuk

Thorn
17-04-06, 11:18
ewww

bianca__croft
17-04-06, 13:44
LOL :vlol:

Jacob x5
17-04-06, 19:21
It's a game, though. :p If that was all in the game I think it would be daft and pointless. :p Imagine it. Lara gets hungry. Lara gets tired. Lara needs a shower. :D

xMiSsCrOfTx
17-04-06, 19:27
She use to have blood fly off her in the old games.
She says "bloody"
She fell in love with the ruins on Legend.
She eats chocolate bars in AOD and lucozade on the advert.

Lmao! Omg! :vlol:

YvesSL
17-04-06, 19:32
SEX

someone had to say it.. lmao Yeah, I would have.

Lucy_Croft
17-04-06, 19:34
Would you really regard Allister as a man? He's such a little sissy boy.

bianca__croft
17-04-06, 20:00
Lol!!!

Natla'd
17-04-06, 20:54
Would you really regard Allister as a man? He's such a little sissy boy.


Ah, come on. He's very attractive, in a whiny sort of way. ;)

bianca__croft
18-04-06, 14:23
EWWWW lol!

Greenkey2
18-04-06, 15:03
She never gets jetlag :pi: