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illuminati30
17-07-06, 21:33
Oh another thread about sexuality, I hear you cry, but sorry I am just fed up. Why do Bisexual guys with girl friends keep hitting on me? <me being male> It is getting beyond a joke.

A guy just started chatting to me, and told me that he is engaged to be married at Christmas! Thatís just not right! I asked if his fiancť knew about him being bisexual, and he said no she would kill him if she knew. It seems like women can tell their male partners they are bisexual, but a man can not do this.

This was an internet chat, I tried to refrain from telling him what I think of him, until he started asking me to meet him for sex. If he is getting married then he needs to be faithful, whole point of getting married. Then he started telling me how he likes guys more than girls.

This is sad. This guy will get married, probably have kids, and its not going to be fair on his wife or children. I think he is gay to be honest, and too ashamed to admit to other people that he is. He is basically conforming to society because it says thatís how he should be. I could do this also, but I have far too much respect for women, and for myself to behave in this way.

tr_mitch
17-07-06, 21:36
Oooh i thought this thread was going to be completed based on me :) And the whole... I have many girl friends... But not in a love way!

Anyway back to the point... Thats pretty bad, and i feel sorry for his Finace...
Shoot him please :)

kewlkyle64
17-07-06, 21:38
That's awful. Maybe you should ask him "Hey what's your email?" and write it down. Send him a message. A lot of families share one email account, maybe you'll be lucky.

Tomb Raider Master
17-07-06, 21:39
The saddest thing is that he knows he's making a mistake and he's going to marry despite that without thinking what could happen some time later when his wife founds out that he's a bisexual. I think I don't see a happy and long future for that marriage.

illuminati30
17-07-06, 21:42
That's awful. Maybe you should ask him "Hey what's your email?" and write it down. Send him a message. A lot of families share one email account, maybe you'll be lucky.

Well its his life man, if he wants to behave like that, i cant stop it. However, one guy did it before, and i pretended i knew him, just to make him sweat. That was a bit mean of me :mis:

I feel sorry for the girlfriend, but i dont really want involved in stuff like that. I guess she will find out for herself.

Kamrusepas
17-07-06, 21:43
A guy just started chatting to me, and told me that he is engaged to be married at Christmas!

...

Then he started telling me how he likes guys more than girls.


That's just wrong. This guy is obviously confused and in no way ready to get married...

illuminati30
17-07-06, 21:45
That's just wrong. This guy is obviously confused and in no way ready to get married...

The sad thing is, he is 31. He must know his sexuality by now?

Elysia
17-07-06, 21:45
Truth is, he probably isn't.

Bisexuality is rather fashionable right now. I've lost count the amount of 'bi sexual' people I've met over the last few years... 'bi sexual' meaning they snogged their same-sex best mate whilst drunk. Once.

Most people are bi-curious at some point, which is fine. Most people have bi-sexual leanings - there are plenty of women I find attractive, and a few I certainly wouldn't say no to if the opportunity arose (and I wasn't married...). If you're genuinely bi, then great! Have a blast! But the recent upsurge in people being 'bi-sexual' really does come across as a bit of a fad. Like platform shoes...

Now, if he *is* genuine, then he has to be honest with his gf and himself. If he can't share that info with the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with, then he's going to have problems. Being in a monogamous marriage isn't just about restricting yourself to one sex / being rampantly heterosexual, but committing yourself to one person, be they the same or the opposite gender to you. The fact that he seems to want to cheat full stop means he shouldn't get married, whether he's straight, gay or bi.

Rivendell
17-07-06, 21:56
The sad thing is, he is 31. He must know his sexuality by now?

Perhaps he does. Perhaps he knows he's bisexual. It's his own choice if he wants to have an affair.
If he is bisexual, then being married isn't going to define his sexuality. Marrying a woman isn't going to make him heterosexual, if he's still attracted to males aswell- people won't stop admiring others simply because they're married. A ring on the finger doesn't stop human nature of the 'roaming eye'.
That comment just makes it seem like all bisexuals are just confused about themselves, their true nature and will one day know that they are either heterosexual or homosexual, like it's a 'make your mind up phase'.

illuminati30
17-07-06, 21:57
Truth is, he probably isn't.

Bisexuality is rather fashionable right now. I've lost count the amount of 'bi sexual' people I've met over the last few years... 'bi sexual' meaning they snogged their same-sex best mate whilst drunk. Once.

Most people are bi-curious at some point, which is fine. Most people have bi-sexual leanings - there are plenty of women I find attractive, and a few I certainly wouldn't say no to if the opportunity arose (and I wasn't married...). If you're genuinely bi, then great! Have a blast! But the recent upsurge in people being 'bi-sexual' really does come across as a bit of a fad. Like platform shoes...

Now, if he *is* genuine, then he has to be honest with his gf and himself. If he can't share that info with the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with, then he's going to have problems. Being in a monogamous marriage isn't just about restricting yourself to one sex / being rampantly heterosexual, but committing yourself to one person, be they the same or the opposite gender to you. The fact that he seems to want to cheat full stop means he shouldn't get married, whether he's straight, gay or bi.

I agree. Although he has been saying he likes guys more. I have seen it so many times. He is probably gay, and will leave his wife when all his kids are grown, or before, and then come out or something. This does happen a lot, and i feel sorry for the wife. You have no idea how many times i have seen this!

However, its not just a fad for this guy, he was telling me he has been with guys. He presumed that because i was male, and that i was gay that i was just going to meet him for sex, and that he could go back to his girlfriend. This made me mad.

You can be bisexual and like both sexes, although this does not mean you can not be faithful. You can also be gay, and live a life trying to hide it. If he is bi-curious, months before getting married at 31 is really not the time to experiment lol

You are probably right though Elysia, he probably shouldnt be married regardless of his sexuality.

Lara Croft!
17-07-06, 22:08
Bisexuality is rather fashionable right now. I've lost count the amount of 'bi sexual' people I've met over the last few years... 'bi sexual' meaning they snogged their same-sex best mate whilst drunk. Once.

Most people are bi-curious at some point, which is fine. Most people have bi-sexual leanings - there are plenty of women I find attractive, and a few I certainly wouldn't say no to if the opportunity arose (and I wasn't married...). If you're genuinely bi, then great! Have a blast! But the recent upsurge in people being 'bi-sexual' really does come across as a bit of a fad. Like platform shoes...


I was going to say about the same things (except that I'm not married :D )


I really can't understand how a person can be genuinely bi.I mean,is he/she able to fall in love with both sexes?Or is it only sexual attraction with one of the 2?I mean,even if I went with a girl,I'd do it out of curiosity and to have fun,but I couldn't fall in love with a fellow female.

So,my question to you bisexuals are:Can u feel feel both love and sexual attraction to both sexes?

Rivendell
17-07-06, 22:10
Simply, yes. :)

Elysia
17-07-06, 22:11
However, its not just a fad for this guy, he was telling me he has been with guys. He presumed that because i was male, and that i was gay that i was just going to meet him for sex, and that he could go back to his girlfriend. This made me mad.


Ahhh... I know this type. I have an old friend like this - obviously gay but didn't want to face up to it, so he eventually admitted he was 'bi'. Had a girlfriend and used to pick up gay guys because 'he had needs she couldn't satisfy'. When she found out, it broke her heart.

Being single or in an open relationship is fine if you want to swap between your preferences, but when you're in a commited relationship, it's just soooo wrong.

tr_mitch
17-07-06, 22:13
So,my question to you bisexuals are:Can u feel feel both love and sexual attraction to both sexes?

I can't really say, because i've never fully been in love... Though i think you can yeah :)

Pipolinne
17-07-06, 22:16
I agree with Elysia:being bissexual now is elegant and fashionable.But perhaps that situation is allowing women and men who are bissexual feeling more free,though, as everything,such a situation is only considered elegant in certain society groups,and does not correspond to a true change of mentalities.

I do not think the bloke you mentioned is being untruthful ,I think he's confused,or actually, once you were in a chat, perhaps he was just fantasizing. Perhaps he's gay,and he lied about his GF, perhaps he's hetero and wanted to imaginate a homosexual relationship and nothing more.

I tend not to believe 90% of what I read in chats,once,as we all know, internet allows us to be anyone, to live any fantasy without the "real thing". The truth is that you don't even know if you were speaking to man or a woman!

illuminati30
17-07-06, 22:17
Ahhh... I know this type. I have an old friend like this - obviously gay but didn't want to face up to it, so he eventually admitted he was 'bi'. Had a girlfriend and used to pick up gay guys because 'he had needs she couldn't satisfy'. When she found out, it broke her heart.

Being single or in an open relationship is fine if you want to swap between your preferences, but when you're in a commited relationship, it's just soooo wrong.

Sad but true, but this is the way soceity is. Until people can stop feeling ashamed of being gay, and not to be afraid to say they are, this is the damage that can be done. These poor women pay the price for it.

However, sometimes there is a more harsh side to me when these guys are involved. I find myself thinking 'get some ****ing balls and be a man, and be brave enough to say who you really are'. This is why when someone comes out, it takes strength, and courage, and i say well done to them.

illuminati30
17-07-06, 22:21
I tend not to believe 90% of what I read in chats,once,as we all know, internet allows us to be anyone, to live any fantasy without the "real thing". The truth is that you don't even know if you were speaking to man or a woman!

True, neither do i, but he was not joking. If i had told him to come round, he would be here now. Trust me, he was a guy LOL

Elysia
17-07-06, 22:22
Sad but true, but this is the way soceity is. Until people can stop feeling ashamed of being gay, and not to be afraid to say they are, this is the damage that can be done. These poor women pay the price for it.

However, sometimes there is a more harsh side to me when these guys are involved. I find myself thinking 'get some ****ing balls and be a man, and be brave enough to say who you really are'. This is why when someone comes out, it takes strength, and courage, and i say well done to them.
Abso****in'loutely!! What annoyed me the most about this particular person was that he abandoned his best friend (who was also my very close friend) when he came out. At least Martin had the balls to admit what he was - considering this was back in the day when being gay really was frowned on much more than it is now (mid 90's - you certainly wouldn't have seen 'Queer Eye for the Straight Guy' on TV then!), it took courage and true determination to be accepted then. Yes, society has to take some of the blame - some of the attitudes out there to homosexuals is just plain disgusting - but in order for things to change, people have to stop all of this denial!

Rivendell
17-07-06, 22:25
... ..

Is this about that man, or bisexuals in general?

I find myself thinking 'get some ****ing balls and be a man, and be brave enough to say who you really are'.

Pipolinne
17-07-06, 22:26
True, neither do i, but he was not joking. If i had told him to come round, he would be here now. Trust me, he was a guy LOL

I've heard of people who even arranged meetings and posh places,and never came up! Of course, you could be right,but how do you know he was telling the truth?! Perhaps his fantasy was telling that story,and then seducing someone.

But that's just me,who,actually,never believed what's being told in chats :D!

illuminati30
17-07-06, 22:30
At least Martin had the balls to admit what he was - considering this was back in the day when being gay really was frowned on much more than it is now (mid 90's - you certainly wouldn't have seen 'Queer Eye for the Straight Guy' on TV then!), it took courage and true determination to be accepted then.

Well its been a while since i was at school or anything like that, but to be honest, i really dont think things are much better. They might be a bit better, but there are still many many people who feel ashamed and even disgusted. Shows like Queer eye for the straight guy do far more harm than good. It creates this stereotype, and thats what people need to get away from. A gay guy will help you pull the chicks because he is into fashion, and hair, and clothes. It shows all gay guys to be camp idiots, and this is not always the case. This is what makes it hard for so many guys to come out and say that are gay, because they dont wanna be part of the nancy boy crowd.

Yes, society has to take some of the blame - some of the attitudes out there to homosexuals is just plain disgusting - but in order for things to change, people have to stop all of this denial!

You are right, it has to come from within, but when society behaves the way it does, it does not help matters one bit. Stopping the denial is easier said than done for the big burly man out there.

Rivendell
17-07-06, 22:32
... ..ok, I'll ask again,

I find myself thinking 'get some ****ing balls and be a man, and be brave enough to say who you really are'.

Is this about that man, or bisexuals in general?

illuminati30
17-07-06, 22:33
... ..

Is this about that man, or bisexuals in general?

The man of course! The men who are gay, but marry because they want to conform to society.

These words are for the soon to be married men who hit on me lol

Rivendell
17-07-06, 22:40
So, how do you actually know he's gay?

He says he's bisexual, so take it like that- why does he have to be gay just because he's hitting on you?
If he's bi, and unfaithful (nothing on this bit to do with sexuality)he's marrying a woman, and hitting on a guy; to me that doesn't say jack about his sexuality, simply that he's following his pants and has chosen to be unfaithful! He likes guys and girls- why should he have to 'get some balls and say who he really is' if he's said he's bi and acts like that?

illuminati30
17-07-06, 22:53
So, how do you actually know he's gay?

He says he's bisexual, so take it like that- why does he have to be gay just because he's hitting on you?
If he's bi, and unfaithful (nothing on this bit to do with sexuality)he's marrying a woman, and hitting on a guy; to me that doesn't say jack about his sexuality, simply that he's following his pants and has chosen to be unfaithful! He likes guys and girls- why should he have to 'get some balls and say who he really is' if he's said he's bi and acts like that?

You are absolutely right. Granted, i have no idea of this guys sexuality. He says he is bisexual, and i have no reason to believe that he is not. However, he did say that he has not told his girlfriend, although i dont see that there is any need to if he is marrying her and plans to stay faithful to her, there is no need for him to tell her. He did also say that he likes guy a lot more than girls, after he was with one. So it does suggest he could be gay.

OK when i said that, it might not apply to him. We have since gone on to talk about other people. I didnt actually say these words to anyone, sometimes i think this, but this is when i hear that a guy is gay, but hides behind a marriage. That is when i start to feel that way, as it is unfair on his wife and on himself, and sometimes even children are involved. Thats when i start to feel that way, but you are right there, these words do not apply to this guy. The thoughts would be more like 'get a life you rat' with this guy rather than anything aimed at his sexuality.

Trust In Trent
17-07-06, 23:00
whats wrong with Bisexual people anyway. Nothing although I would say I've had a friend who was a guy who said he did like me.

But to be honest I told him that I had no interest in pursing this relationship with him.( just to quote I am 100% not queer).

He's still a friend of mine. According to him he prefers guys because he says there less annoying then women.

illuminati30
17-07-06, 23:09
whats wrong with Bisexual people anyway. Nothing .

I have to make this clear, this is not an attack on Bisexual people. This is about gay men, who pretend to their wives that they are straight, and hide behind a marriage because they would rather live like this than accept the fact that they are gay.

I was responding to the example Elysia made

Ahhh... I know this type. I have an old friend like this - obviously gay but didn't want to face up to it, so he eventually admitted he was 'bi'. Had a girlfriend and used to pick up gay guys because 'he had needs she couldn't satisfy'. When she found out, it broke her heart.

And how sometimes this kind of man can really make me mad. There are people like this.

Trust In Trent
17-07-06, 23:11
I have to make this clear, this is not an attack on Bisexual people. This is about gay men, who pretend to their wives that they are straight, and hide behind a marriage because they would rather live like this than accept the fact that they are gay.

I was responding to the example Elysia made



And how sometimes this kind of man can really make me mad. There are people like this.

Chill, I know you wasn't I was stating it there ok to hang out with thats all.

illuminati30
17-07-06, 23:13
Chill, I know you wasn't I was stating it there ok to hang out with thats all.

:D Just dont want anyone getting the wrong idea.

laracroft2122
18-07-06, 21:47
Nevermind

Rivendell
18-07-06, 21:49
Lol! Nevermind what? That was a bit random! :whi:

laracroft2122
18-07-06, 21:51
Lol! Nevermind what? That was a bit random! :whi:

Posted in wrong thread

CerebralAssassin
18-07-06, 21:52
Posted in wrong thread
I was finally pleased to see someone finally revived an interesting thread and now I read this?:mad: :mad:

Rivendell
18-07-06, 21:53
What's your views on the whole situation then Cerebral? :wve:

laracroft2122
18-07-06, 21:54
I was finally pleased to see someone finally revived an interesting thread and now I read this?:mad: :mad:

Well er....okay erm.... I suppose that bi must be a common thing nower days, but gay, could you imagine if all become gay, there would be no reproduction

Alive_and_Funky
18-07-06, 21:55
Well er....okay erm.... I suppose that bi must be a common thing nower days, but gay, could you imagine if all become gay, there would be no reproduction

And if humans don't reproduce, then non-human animals will take over the Earth.

Rivendell
18-07-06, 21:56
DunDunDAAHH conspiracy :p

CerebralAssassin
18-07-06, 21:56
What's your views on the whole situation then Cerebral? :wve:
views on what...bisexuality:confused: all is good man..that's how I see it..:wve:

Rivendell
18-07-06, 21:57
The bi guys who hit on illuminati and have wives situation ;)

CerebralAssassin
18-07-06, 21:59
The bi guys who hit on illuminati and have wives situation ;)
well I don't have any thing new to bring to the table..I'll just flat out agree with Illuminati and say that it's wrong to have a double-life and that bisexual people should have the balls to come out..:)

tombraider123
18-07-06, 22:03
Question - Being Bisexual is like fashionable now or whatever?

But if you are Straight...How can you make yourself Bisexual, is it possible to make yourself want both sexes, if you were straight?

tr_mitch
18-07-06, 22:06
Question - Being Bisexual is like fashionable now or whatever?

But if you are Straight...How can you make yourself Bisexual, is it possible to make yourself want both sexes, if you were straight?

You can't make yourself bisexual... It's fake if staight people are pretending to be bi, they'll just make out with the same sex and possibly have sexual relationships just to give them the title 'bisexual' Pretty damn stupid if you ask me.

Rivendell
18-07-06, 22:07
You could try, but I think it's pretending. I don't know if it's possible to "make" yourself bi, you're either attracted , or you're not as far as I know!

StarCroft:AOD
18-07-06, 22:23
I agree with Mitch That is not possible and that is simply a myth.

illuminati30
18-07-06, 23:05
well I don't have any thing new to bring to the table..I'll just flat out agree with Illuminati and say that it's wrong to have a double-life and that bisexual people should have the balls to come out..:)

Although i didnt say bisexual people need to come out. Its not like i believe that people are either gay or straight, i know people are bisexual. I never said bisexual people need to find the balls to come out.

To quote myself earlier

I have to make this clear, this is not an attack on Bisexual people. This is about gay men, who pretend to their wives that they are straight, and hide behind a marriage because they would rather live like this than accept the fact that they are gay.



Savvy?

illuminati30
18-07-06, 23:09
Question - Being Bisexual is like fashionable now or whatever?

But if you are Straight...How can you make yourself Bisexual, is it possible to make yourself want both sexes, if you were straight?

I strongly believe that genetic make up will determine sexuality. I also dont buy this whole bisexual is trendy at the moment stuff. You are either bisexual or not, and its as easy as that.

CerebralAssassin
18-07-06, 23:35
Although i didnt say bisexual people need to come out. Its not like i believe that people are either gay or straight, i know people are bisexual. I never said bisexual people need to find the balls to come out.

To quote myself earlier



Savvy?
ok ok..I misread your post..no need to get worked up!:)

illuminati30
18-07-06, 23:42
I am just seeing this post now, i seem to have missed it out as i was replying to Elysia.

Perhaps he does. Perhaps he knows he's bisexual. It's his own choice if he wants to have an affair. .

Perhaps. Although he did say he likes guys a lot more, which suggests to me that he is probably gay.

If he is bisexual, then being married isn't going to define his sexuality. Marrying a woman isn't going to make him heterosexual, if he's still attracted to males aswell- people won't stop admiring others simply because they're married. A ring on the finger doesn't stop human nature of the 'roaming eye'..

I know.

That comment just makes it seem like all bisexuals are just confused about themselves, their true nature and will one day know that they are either heterosexual or homosexual, like it's a 'make your mind up phase'.

No, i know it does not work like this at all. I know many people who are bisexual, and 100% sure of themseleves, i am in no way suggesting that all bisexual people are having some kind of sexual dilemma. Bisexual, homosexual, hetrosexual, all of them i know, exist. I have known that i am gay from about the age of 12, although i guess it does not work this way for everyone.

illuminati30
18-07-06, 23:44
ok ok..I misread your post..no need to get worked up!:)

No worries :wve:

its just this thread seems to be coming across all wrong to some people, and now i am kinda wishing i had never started it.

Thorir
19-07-06, 00:41
Sin is in, sweetie!

Straight men and women, gay men and women, bisexual men and women may all cheat on their lovers. It's their choice. I feel bad for the cheated partner, but it is a decicion that they have to make.

I think it would be better to be honest to their partners...
And suggest a threesome instead. :D

CerebralAssassin
19-07-06, 00:42
Sin is in, sweetie!

Straight men and women, gay men and women, bisexual men and women may all cheat on their lovers. It's their choice. I feel bad for the cheated partner, but it is a decicion that they have to make.

I think it would be better to be honest to their partners...
And suggest a threesome instead. :D
now that's an idea :cln:

Thorir
19-07-06, 00:50
Yeah, I'm sure they could come to some arrangement. :)
There are lots of kinky people out there! Trust me... :mis:

Melonie Tomb Raider
19-07-06, 01:02
:eek: Three? Yeah... I'm going to run far, far away from this thread, because my views on love being between one man and one woman isn't accepted here.

illuminati30
19-07-06, 01:17
:eek: Three? Yeah... I'm going to run far, far away from this thread, because my views on love being between one man and one woman isn't accepted here.

Actually they are. If you have something to say, i will listen to it and accept it. What makes you think all people here dont believe love is between 2 people only? However, i will disagree with it needing to be a man and a woman.

Spitfire
19-07-06, 03:48
Why does it have to be purely one on one, can't anyone change things up once and awhile and try new things, not everything has to be so plain and simple, not to mention traditional.

:eek: Three? Yeah... I'm going to run far, far away from this thread, because my views on love being between one man and one woman isn't accepted here.
Obviously the Thread struck some interest in you to take a peak and post, and while i agree with you in some aspects since im straight, you always say the same thing.

Melonie Tomb Raider
19-07-06, 03:57
I've never discussed multiple people relationships, so that wouldn't be the "same thing".

I checked this topic earlier and saw it was about cheating, but left and decided to check up on it again and noticed some one brought "threesomes" into the issue.

Making love truly isn't about love if you add another person into the picture. Unless you're in love with two people. :rolleyes:

What is so simple and boring about being with one person and one person alone? That's called love.

Bringing more people into the picture is disgusting. I don't see anything "interesting" about such an act.

Additionally, Spitfire, do you expect me to say different things? You said I always say the same thing, well that's beause my beliefs haven't changed. If these topics come up, am I not allowed to post what I believe because it will be consistant with what I said before? That doesn't sound very fair.

Illumati, thank you for respecting my beliefs. :hug:

Spitfire
19-07-06, 04:04
I've never discussed multiple people relationships, so that wouldn't be the "same thing".

I checked this topic earlier and saw it was about cheating, but left and decided to check up on it again and noticed some one brought "threesomes" into the issue.

Making love truly isn't about love if you add another person into the picture. Unless you're in love with two people. :rolleyes:

What is so simple and boring about being with one person and one person alone? That's called love.

Bringing more people into the picture is disgusting. I don't see anything "interesting" about such an act.

Additionally, Spitfire, do you expect me to say different things? You said I always say the same thing, well that's beause my beliefs haven't changed. If these topics come up, am I not allowed to post what I believe because it will be consistant with what I said before? That doesn't sound very fair.

Illumati, thank you for respecting my beliefs. :hug:

I'm not against ur beliefs at all and infact when "Making love" i agree it should only be two people but i also believe you have have sex and not be making love, thats where i have the change in having more than one person in mind. I hope i didn't come off as mean cause it wasn't intended that way.

When i meant you say the same thing it's that yes, you do stick by your belief and when it came to multiple partners you ended it the same, going back to your beliefs between a man and women.

And Mel I do respect your beliefs and how firmly you stick by them.
I hope you understood that.

Melonie Tomb Raider
19-07-06, 04:08
Well I'm sorry for taking your comments the wrong way Spitfire. :hug:

Joey_P
19-07-06, 04:18
Ew, thats why I never date girls!

Shark_Blade
19-07-06, 08:23
This man needs to face the truth of what he really is. Sooner or later, it's going to haunt himself and brings a lot of trouble.

As for me, I truly belief on one on one relationship with a girl. I don't know why, but it's what my heart keeps telling me to be faithful and honest. Blergh, sounds mushy. *wipe sweat away

But that's my opinion.

Gomes
19-07-06, 08:24
illuminati30, that guy is absolutely disgusting. One thing is being free to love whoever you want, openly and honestly with the consent of everyone involved, another is cheating people and taking pleasure from it, which is what he is doing. He's a worthless coward.

Marriage should not be taken lightly. It's a challenging situation for people that take long term relationships and the desire to love a person throughout life (not just until they can take something out of them) and raising a family very seriously.

As for the whole bi-curious trend just proves to me sexuality is a matter of choice or adquired taste, not nature. The whole gay argument "we don't chose to be this way, we were born like this" was never convincing to me.

One thing that bothers me is while they want to defend their rights, some bi/ gay people are rude and offensive to straight people. Many seem to suffer from heterophobia (not pointing at anyone here, some experience I had with people elsewhere).

Mel, I admire you for sticking with tradition on this. There is value behind tradition and many people miss out on it while looking for freedom (I know I did).

Shark_Blade
19-07-06, 08:24
Ew, thats why I never date girls!
Why exactly?

Mona Sax
19-07-06, 09:52
As for the whole bi-curious trend just proves to me sexuality is a matter of choice or adquired taste, not nature. The whole gay argument "we don't chose to be this way, we were born like this" was never convincing to me.

I'd rather say they're not really bisexual at all. Just like wearing a Yankees cap doesn't make you a rapper. It's about who you are, not what you do.

Mel, of course your views are accepted. It's obvious that it's okay to have sex only as a couple, nobody will tell you to sleep with more than one partner. However, you'll have to accept that other people might make a different decision for themselves. Just because people say threesomes are okay doesn't mean twosomes aren't.

Pipolinne
19-07-06, 10:05
This new bissexual trend is something very connected to a certain type of Art ,Literature and Fashion. Normallly ( and erroneously) is connected to an androginic (I hope I'm spelling it right) look and it's very explored in commercials,etc.

But,actually, bissexuality is highly penalized in the homossexual communities,so perhaps that man prefered to present himself as a coward and a cheater,rather than as a bissexual. And,as I said, he might not have wife,that may be only his fantasy,nothing more.

Sexuality is a complex dimension,involving biological and social issues,Gomes. It's not a simplistic and absolute thing!And,even if it was a choice, why should it be less worthy??!!

illuminati30
19-07-06, 12:22
illuminati30, that guy is absolutely disgusting. One thing is being free to love whoever you want, openly and honestly with the consent of everyone involved, another is cheating people and taking pleasure from it, which is what he is doing. He's a worthless coward.

Yes cheating is bad, no matter what sexuality. Although i dont know this person, and really the thread is not aimed at him alone, again its really aimed at gay people who pretend to be something they are not. I am not going to judge this guy and say he is disgusting. I know nothing about him, plus there are two sides to everything, and for all we know his girlfriend might be behaving in the same way. I am not saying this makes it right though.


As for the whole bi-curious trend just proves to me sexuality is a matter of choice or adquired taste, not nature. The whole gay argument "we don't chose to be this way, we were born like this" was never convincing to me..

Sorry, but i dont agree here. At the age of 12 i didnt just sit there and think, hmm i think i will like guys, just to make things difficult for myself. That makes no sense at all.

One thing that bothers me is while they want to defend their rights, some bi/ gay people are rude and offensive to straight people. Many seem to suffer from heterophobia (not pointing at anyone here, some experience I had with people elsewhere).

There are gay people like that, but the same could be said in reverse. These people seem to think its wise to respond in a similar way, when really it is not doing themselves any favors. The key word you used here was 'some bi/ gay people are rude and offensive to straight people'. Just like going to a football match you will get hooligans, but it does not mean all fans of football are hooligan idiots. Please dont allow this minority of gay/bi people to allow you to believe all will behave in this way. I have met many gay and bi people, and most of them are very opened minded to a lot of things.

illuminati30
19-07-06, 12:24
Ew, thats why I never date girls!

Could you explain? Whats wrong with girls?

illuminati30
19-07-06, 12:40
But, actually, bisexuality is highly penalized in the homosexual communities, so perhaps that man preferred to present himself as a coward and a cheater,rather than as a bissexual. And,as I said, he might not have wife,that may be only his fantasy,nothing more.



Well I can only go from my own experience and the gay people I know are perfectly accepting of bisexual people, as I am myself.

However, you are onto something here. I think there is always a worry that dating a bisexual person, this person may choose to give up on the same sex relationship because its proving too hard for them to deal with it in their lives, but instead choose the easy option, and have a different sex relationship in order to conform to how society says we should live. I have seen this many times as well. I think I have seen everything you could ever imagine lol and its society dictating how we should be and how we must live our life.

Also, I think many people will label themselves bisexual during a transitional stage before coming out and saying they are gay. Again, don’t flame me, I didn’t say all. There is a trend I have seen for example, a guy will go into a gay bar (the guy being gay) but it may be his first time there, or he may be apprehensive, and unsure of the environment, and not really sure if he wants to be in a relationship with a guy. Therefore will label himself as bisexual, so that he has a purpose for being there, but as time goes on, you will see this guy in the same pub night after night, and in the end he will just say ‘yes actually I am gay’. I have seen this happen many times as well.

I hope it comes across correctly what I am trying to say.

psychokitten
19-07-06, 13:03
Gosh I feel so sorry for that guy's poor fiance.

I used to be engaged to a bisexual crossdresser...well, you can see where that one was heading already, can't you :P It all got too complicated and icky so I ended it, but I honestly wouldn't be surprised if someone told me he was fully gay now. He was definitely heading down that road.

illuminati30
19-07-06, 13:16
Personally, I see sexuality like a scale in percentage. 0% being totally straight, 50% being bisexual, and gay being 100%. You could have it the other way around, it wouldnít matter. I also think that to fall on 0 or 50 or 100 is not very likely, but still possible. If I were to rate myself on this scale, I would say I was about 90%, therefore like guys a lot more, and feel it would be unfair to to date a girl. I guess technically speaking it makes us all bisexual, unless we fall on either 0% or 100%.

However, I still donít buy this bisexuality is a growing trend or fashionable thing to do at the moment, and anyone who would pretend would be either a child, or has no idea of what they are spewing.

What I donít buy is the theory sometimes seen on this forum that people use the excuse of being bisesual as a reason to sleep around, that is an obscene theory. Sleeping around has nothing to do with sexuality, but it always seems to come into these kinds of threads.

illuminati30
20-07-06, 16:07
It happened again, well kind of, the guy said he was bisexual, but i think he might be single.

I got this message on a dating website, and responded with:

Me: How come you dont have face pics?

It's just that I'm a bit scared as i'm not really out... and someone mist recognise me... sorry. X

Me: out as what?

You know what I mean... being gay! it's okay if you have a problem with it... I understand.x

Me: I have no problem with it, do you? Your profile says Bisexual though. Anyway, whats to be afraid of?

I really wish I knew what I was scared off... it can just be a bit lonely sometimes not having many people to talk too...

Me: I am sure it is. You know what you must do. Do what you need to to find what you want. Do not be afraid for everything will be fine. Take inspiration from manifestations of your true nature.

You dont have to be lonely, you can always talk to me.