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xMiSsCrOfTx
09-04-07, 23:45
I don't usually rant like this on TRF, but I had to laugh. My sister just showed my mom her report card. She always gets straight A's, her grades are perfect. I was never like that. I'm two years older than her, but all my life I've felt like she's always outdone me on everything I've ever done. It sickens me; it's like I have to work so much harder at school, everything just comes so easy for her.

I'm not whining because she gets more attention than me or anything, I'm not bothered. It's just hitting me that I'm kind of a dissapointment to my family. I've never gotten straight A's, in fact, I don't remember the last time I actually got an A in anything. I just feel like I'm not good enough. And with college just around the corner, I'm really starting to worry.

So, now the point where everyone gets to 'discuss'! Do any of you have siblings or family members that are constantly outdoing everything, or do any of you ever feel like this? Cause boy, does it suck.

tr_mitch
09-04-07, 23:56
I'm exactly the same.
I'm the middle child so I've always been screwed from the start :p But yeah my brothers always get good grades, out perform me, and practically perfect in every sense. I'm such the opposite of both of them.

Mr.Burns
09-04-07, 23:58
Actually, my sister didn't really start acknowledge me as her sibling till I was 18. As for living in her shadow, I did to an extent but I ended up choosing a career path more towards my liking and she just went with what my father did. Now I suspect she regrets that decision. Alyssa, don't worry about your grades not being top notch. College is a different environment and you might find it more towards your learning style. I barely passed high school yet managed to keep a 3.2 GPA in college. I suspect this was due to my high school being notoriously tough. Don't worry about being a disappointment, focus on what you want to do in life and go for it.

peffect
10-04-07, 00:00
My sisters are not that perfect but they're better than me when it comes to studies and school stuff, but I doesn't bother me at all! I can do other things that they can't. :D

Joe_16
10-04-07, 00:01
Well, no-one in my family is particulary intellegent to be honest. My younger sister does have alot of potential though (she's 11) and has been recognised by her teachers as 'naturally gifted'.

I never got A's at school. I think it was a combination of not being that naturally clever, and my lack of motivation. If i'ld studied harder, I could have got A's I suppose, I dunno.

But hey, the less cleverer people tend to have better personalities, as the saying goes ;). Just kidding.

Ada the Mental
10-04-07, 00:06
Well...My younger brother is definitely out of question but I think hat my little sister,who's about 5 years younger than me,will end up getting better results than the ones I get now.For the simple reason that she has the nessecary patient and discipline and fear for failure to get her butt down and study,which is something I certainly lack.:p
Not that my grades are bad but the days I got top marks in every subject belong to the secondary school days.

Joe_16
10-04-07, 00:08
Ah yes, secondary school. I was top set material back then.

Legends
10-04-07, 00:09
Well, I don’t really have a family anymore. After my parents’ divorce, I got stuck with my dad who it seems doesn’t even notice that I actually live with him. I understand your problem because I never got straight A’s in school either. I was always the guy out partying and hung out with my friends instead of what I was supposed to do, so I can blame myself for not having better grades, but I never had anyone to try and help me get good grades either. As long as you have somebody who’s there for you, helping you, that’s the most important thing of all.

CerebralAssassin
10-04-07, 00:13
ah yes,my sister did outdo me as far as high school grades are concerned,but I was happy for her!wasn't jealous...

I do have more college credits than her though (have a 3.2 gpa),as she dropped out of college after one year:(

Joe_16
10-04-07, 00:14
I was always expected to be the clever one of the family. My parents used to think I was extremely gifted back when I was 12-13.

Nothing ever really motivated me to try that hard though. Then I turned 16 and I was led astray a bit, partying, alcohol etc.

Anubis_AF
10-04-07, 00:31
I can almost understand what you feel. My sister has been better than me during her educational years, even in college; which isn't very encouraging to me especially since I had more time to learn the new language before her (she was older when we changed our location). But now, I seem to begin regaining the balance between us. Not entirely of course, mainly because I'm a guy and can't stand to study as much as she does.

So I wouldn't worry, MissCroft. I'm sure you'll kick ass in lots of other fields in the future ;)

Camera Obscura
10-04-07, 00:46
To me I feel like my younger sister lives in my shadow, but at least the family doesn't talk :cen: behind her back.

DREWY
10-04-07, 01:53
My sister was always the clever one too. She was dux of the school, won scholarships and did nothing with it. I think if eveything comes easy you don't appreciate it as much, and may even take it for granted. Remember success in school does not necessarily translate to success in life. You'll do just fine :tmb:

Forwen
10-04-07, 02:46
It's just hitting me that I'm kind of a dissapointment to my family.

The real question is whether you are a disappointment to yourself. Perception of others should take a backseat to that.

AnthonyShock1515
10-04-07, 02:57
I felt like that last year

There was this kid John who I sat opposite in Science last year. He would never revise for his tests and he constantly bugged me asking for the answer to things. Yet he did absoloutly amazing on the end of unit tests. I never understood and he would always rub it in my face. lol

I know it's frustrating but you just have to live through it.:hea: :p

P.S: He's not laughing now, he got put in top set and apparently his grades are dropping.:o (no offense, you are intellegent) I think she might have one aspect of he intellegence that might be beating you.:D

Lara Coft Baby
10-04-07, 04:08
I have a older sister and she did seem like she ever tried to out do me on any thing. But I am dyslexic and I've never gotten any A's in school and I've kind of felt as if I'm not good enough. And my sister dose seem to get more attention then me. Cause every one is talking to her "Hows work?" "Hows your boyfriend?" :mad: But they never talk to me it just dont seem fair :mad:

JANKERSON
10-04-07, 04:12
I don't usually rant like this on TRF, but I had to laugh. My sister just showed my mom her report card. She always gets straight A's, her grades are perfect. I was never like that. I'm two years older than her, but all my life I've felt like she's always outdone me on everything I've ever done. It sickens me; it's like I have to work so much harder at school, everything just comes so easy for her.

I'm not whining because she gets more attention than me or anything, I'm not bothered. It's just hitting me that I'm kind of a dissapointment to my family. I've never gotten straight A's, in fact, I don't remember the last time I actually got an A in anything. I just feel like I'm not good enough. And with college just around the corner, I'm really starting to worry.

So, now the point where everyone gets to 'discuss'! Do any of you have siblings or family members that are constantly outdoing everything, or do any of you ever feel like this? Cause boy, does it suck.

As long as you really give it your best it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. :)

Do the best you can and I am sure you will be fine.

Ikas90
10-04-07, 05:03
I don't usually rant like this on TRF, but I had to laugh. My sister just showed my mom her report card. She always gets straight A's, her grades are perfect. I was never like that. I'm two years older than her, but all my life I've felt like she's always outdone me on everything I've ever done. It sickens me; it's like I have to work so much harder at school, everything just comes so easy for her.

I'm just an older brother that suffers from school. I get low grades, and my parents have a go at me. They expect too much, and it puts down my self-esteem sometimes. I have to work very hard, and then at the end, I get low grades, so there's basically no point for me to try anymore. It's useless for my parents to ask me to do good, because it just ain't gonna happen! :)

I'm not whining because she gets more attention than me or anything, I'm not bothered. It's just hitting me that I'm kind of a dissapointment to my family. I've never gotten straight A's, in fact, I don't remember the last time I actually got an A in anything. I just feel like I'm not good enough. And with college just around the corner, I'm really starting to worry.

You shouldn't feel disappointed. Personally, I know that I wont be able to get perfect grades, the important thing is that you know you've tried. :) After all, I always manage to look on the bright side. :)

Taylour
10-04-07, 05:42
I hate to say it, but it feels good to be the sibling that's casting the shadow.

What I mean to say is that I'm an only child, but I have a lot of cousins, a few of the have gone to jail for drugs and most of the others are drop outs and criminals. While all my life I was raised getting all A's (still do) and I don't do drugs/drink, I also show respect, and it really does feel good to have people under you, in a way it sort of pushes you to work, to stay on top.

:) sorry for sounding way to shallow haha.

frostfur452
10-04-07, 09:31
I am an only child (well I have an older half brother and sister but they have their own seperate families) So I've never had the sibling shadow problem. I however often get put down in the fact that one of my mothers friends daughters or sons will perform better than me at school and grades. So I pretty much get the same flack too and I don't have any brothers or sisters =(

Lenochka
10-04-07, 11:23
I have always lived in my cousins shadow, Always straight A's, has a car, a job etc... Yet what my family doesn’t seem to notice is he came by a good job through his dad who works at the same place... Which really gets to me, they act as if he went to the ends of the earth to find a job when all he did was become 17 >.< Now with siblings... my sister is a drop out drunk without a job... I have that part covered xD but my brother... still to young to know if he will surpass me in academic abilities and knowledge or life in general...

Lara Croft!
10-04-07, 11:29
My siblings are 9 and 10 years older,so I never had a problem with them casting their shadow on me!I know study in the University the same thing my sister did,so mum can't compare us!Plus,I am the youngest in the family,so all love and attention came to me from everyone!:jmp:

Dote
10-04-07, 12:37
the school was never a problem for me although my mother was far more caring for my sister while she often yelled and argued with me, still to this day its like that i have to help out more then my sister when im visiting at home.

MiCkiZ88
10-04-07, 12:44
So, now the point where everyone gets to 'discuss'! Do any of you have siblings or family members that are constantly outdoing everything, or do any of you ever feel like this? Cause boy, does it suck.

I have two step sisters (from marriage). One younger than me and one older than me. Since the last 4 years I've been the neglected one.. (when they got married) and it does suck. My grades went downhill, they all live apart from me, they get all the attention. Even free cars from my dad and step mom! I'm the one starving here and they don't even ''chat'' with me anymore. They all think that I can survive on my own and there's nothing to be worried about. It annoys the crap out of me =\ When I ask for help they wont help. But I have to help then financially everytime! I have to even pay some of their bills. It ****ing sucks!

:(

angelika
10-04-07, 12:56
Every person is different. School grades don't mean than someone is smarter than somebody else.
Bare in mind that the grades are put by teachers, so the personal contact with the teacher can affect your A or B. Some teacher grade the effort regardless the result.

Statistically the most successfull people professionally had low or average grades at school.

Catapharact
10-04-07, 13:06
Though many may not agree with me, I say Sibling rivalry is probably the greatest motivator to personal achievement than anything else.

Me and my Bros have always been competitive and in no way would we let ourselves be overshadowed by any one of our siblings. I am the second oldest of four bros and well... me and my older bro have had made it a personal goal to outdo each other... May it be athletisism, Education, Skills... Love life Lol! You name it. Don't get me wrong, we all have been as close and loving to each other as the most tight knit group of siblings but we were not gonna let any one of us outshine the other.

Now that me and my older bro have grown older and have had an opportunity to focus on other aspects of life (Significant others being one of them Lol!) we kinda eased off on the competition since it didn't become such a prime directive anymore. But I credit all the hard work, the drive and the motivation I took to better myself to that rivalry. And I wouldn't have had it any other way.

Lara Croft!
10-04-07, 13:06
Statistically the most successfull people professionally had low or average grades at school.

Depends on what you mean successfull...If someone doesn't know how to read,but becomes a mafia boss,he will be successfull?Mmm,the only example I can think of is Einstein that had to repeat a whole year as a student since he didn't study at all!

Angelus
10-04-07, 13:12
I have two step sisters (from marriage). One younger than me and one older than me. Since the last 4 years I've been the neglected one.. (when they got married) and it does suck. My grades went downhill, they all live apart from me, they get all the attention. Even free cars from my dad and step mom! I'm the one starving here and they don't even ''chat'' with me anymore. They all think that I can survive on my own and there's nothing to be worried about. It annoys the crap out of me =\ When I ask for help they wont help. But I have to help then financially everytime! I have to even pay some of their bills. It ****ing sucks!

:(

:hug:

Lara Forever
10-04-07, 14:39
4 years ago I was the only child and then my mom got pregnant.i was happy for some time and then my brother was born,and i knew that sometimes im gonna get jealous or something else.he is 4 years old and my parents says he is small and that I cant kick him in but beacuse of that,but he really is too smart for 4 year old boy.he can count and do some writings and he can play tomb raider.

when he breakes something its on my fault cause he just smiles and and I did too,which i didnt always have to give my money for that vase or window.last night he slapped me in my face with my own bra,come on,that was not fair.my dad did nothing about it.sometimes they wont let me out with my friends because "i breaked something".


he always know how to get out,
but i have solution , use my camera to record him while he's doing something BAD and then show to my parents .mwahahaha..
and i dont let him touch my tr games...

:o :o :o i suggest you shouldnt pay attention to it cause it will go away,maybe you should talk to your parents,.i did talked to mine but it didnt turned out nice.;)

Forwen
10-04-07, 14:53
Statistically the most successfull people professionally had low or average grades at school.

Yeah, based on the very same premise and on Einstein's shining example me and my classmate already figured out we're doomed to discover hyperspace.

Lew
10-04-07, 15:37
Well, I'm the middle child, my sister whos younger by about 15 minutes (twins) finds it hard at school where as my now 19 year old brother was a badass, I can be both good at school or just when i hate the lesson I wont do much work, I managed to get an A in designing ICT and a C/B in Maths and in English. DT is my worst subject, don't know why I chose it, I'm so far behind it in everything.

What I've deicided to do is work hard in college and university and try and get the best I can, also with GCSEs too, that is, if I do well in them.

Draco
10-04-07, 19:06
I live in my own shadow...its euphoric, yet daunting.

Mad Tony
10-04-07, 19:10
Well, I have a step brother (he's 21 and in the Navy now) but I think I'm the one who's outdoing him at the moment. :p

Forwen
10-04-07, 19:12
Well, I have a step brother (he's 21 and in the Navy now) but I think I'm the one who's outdoing him at the moment. :p

How so? You're in NASA? :tea:

Mad Tony
10-04-07, 19:16
How so? You're in NASA? :tea::vlol: Good one! All I'm doing is just getting better grades than he did when he was in school. :p

xcrushterx
10-04-07, 19:16
Apparent;y I'm the one who outshines my siblings. I'm not trying to be boastful or anything btw. I'm the youngest of 4. My oldest sister is 29 and has a kid and husband. Apparently she was really smart in school (And still is) As I'm only 14 I've had to live up to that since the start. My second oldest sister isn't exactly stupid, but she comes across as thick because she doesn't tend to use her brain that much outside work. My third oldest sister is in college and doing something she is good at. She may not be smart at many academic subjects, but she is good with this. With this to live up to, I've ALWAYS did my best and seem to do well in class. (I've got the highest mark in my class for a test on more than one occasion this year;)) So to answer the question: No, but I have had to live up to it :) (I'm the youngest and I'm the only boy :o.)

Voni
10-04-07, 19:47
I can relate to so much that's been said on this thread. I have one younger sister (I'm 21, she's 18), and through most of my childhood I felt I was living in hers or other childrens' shadows. My parents always had questions like, 'Why aren't you in the choir? Why haven't you got full marks on this test? Why haven't you done this that or the other? Etc etc.'

My parents split up last year and it turns out a lot of that came from their failing marriage. While I can see how it happened, it upsets me. I've grown up believing that I'll never be good enough, and although I know it isn't true, I still believe it. I'm not as clever as those I work with, not as pretty as my friends, not as funny as my boyfriend and so on.

It makes me really wary about having my own children. What if I mess them up? It doesn't bear thinking about.

SpongeBob Lover
10-04-07, 19:50
unfortunatly, my sister had always been the pretty one, the popular one, the loved one, the one with a bright future, the on with perfect grades, the one with a perfect boyfriend, the spoiled one.... sometimes i feel like ramming a fork down her throat, all my uncles and aunts loves her, she gets so annoying sometimes and what i hate the most is when my parent are alwasy saying "why couldnt you be like your sister brenda, she always got good grades and look at you, your going to be a failiure" even my coaches start blabbing on about my sister, i feel like slicing their tongue up. but i come to live with it

Voni
10-04-07, 19:52
unfortunatly, my sister had always been the pretty one, the popular one, the loved one, the one with a bright future, the on with perfect grades, the one with a perfect boyfriend, the spoiled one.... sometimes i feel like ramming a fork down her throat, all my uncles and aunts loves her, she gets so annoying sometimes and what i hate the most is when my parent are alwasy saying "why couldnt you be like your sister brenda, she always got good grades and look at you, your going to be a failiure" even my coaches start blabbing on about my sister, i feel like slicing their tongue up. but i come to live with it

A nice quick 'I'M NOT MY BLOODY SISTER YOU FOOLS!' should fix that one!

Seriously though, that's not productive. No two people are ever going to perform the same way, siblings or not. People drive me crazy.

tampi
10-04-07, 19:53
All that changes with time. The life is long in that sense. :)

SpongeBob Lover
10-04-07, 19:55
A nice quick 'I'M NOT MY BLOODY SISTER YOU FOOLS!' should fix that one!


:vlol: i wish :jmp:

LaraCablara
10-04-07, 20:08
My sister is in college, and I'm not, and I never really feel like I'm in her shadow because we are in completely different worlds (in terms of school). I get generally good grades, except math, and science. I don't have anyone to help me out in Math, my parents never used any of the stuff I'm learning (its REALLY pointless) they only know Percents so they could do taxes, I'm trying in science but I really couldn't care less about rocks.

Don't feel bad though, in the end you'll both get where you want to be, and your parents will be proud.