Amanda. The Interview!!

[tha_mattster]

Ok finally after days of searching I managed to track down Amanda! How? Well I searched for James Rutland’s address in the Yellow pages and got through to his dad who gave me her address. Then I called that house, but was told she has moved on. So I get a new address and go there!

This is not the sort of neighbourhood I like to be in! I looks like Amanda’s life is going downhill fast!




I approach the apartment and knock on the door.

“Who is it?” A female voice calls from the other side of the door.

(I lie through my teeth,) “I am a journalist that supports your erm…interest in Avalon and have composed a list of questions from your erm...fans. Could I come in?” Slowly a pretty woman with startling ice blue eyes and a platinum bob of hair peers round the door. She eyes me suspiciously then welcomes me in.




Her apartment is tiny, dingy and smelly. It is clearly the apartment of someone who is at the bottom of their game! She moves some garbage from the sofa in the middle of the living room and indicates that I sit down. I do so and she sits on the armchair opposite.

She offers me some herbal tea which I decline, then asks me to begin.

VonCroy360 asks;

1. Tell us something about Lara, the time she was your friend and the time she was your enemy?

Lara?! I thought you were interested in Avalon?!

(I am I say, it’s just that well your fans find you some what of an enigma and are curious to know more about the life you lead.)

Well, Lara was 17 when I first met her. She was my best friend through university. We both shared a fascination for archaeology. I always wanted to rediscover mystical knowledge about the past, but according to Lara this interfered with my ability to become a scientist.

When she was my enemy? Hmm…She still is! She destroyed my chances of reaching Avolon…ruined my dreams and killed James! I haven’t forgiven her and I’ll never forget the pain that selfish cow caused me! (she appears totally distraught about James)

2. Do you die your hair?

No, it’s completely natural. Do you want some wine? I could use a drink.

(No thanks I reply)

Ok wait here, (she crosses the living room and disappears from view.)

(I sit there and twiddle my thumbs until I spot a book with the title of, ‘Evil for Dummies’ by Natla Publishing. As I reach forward to pick up the book Amanda reappears with a bottle of red wine.)



3. Do you know anything about Natla technologies?

Not really, except it is a corporation run by Jacqueline Natla, who was an acquaintance of James’s.

4. Was there anything between you and James W. Rutland jr.?

Maybe, (a cheeky smile as she gulps a swig of wine from the bottle,) Yes we were lovers and he was also my employer.

5. How many tattoos do you have?

I have 5. But I am getting 3 more – one running down the length of my leg, one on the back of neck and one……somewhere else. (I fear to ask!)

Natla'd asks:

1. Have you heard of Sophia Leigh? Are you related to her?

Um…Does she have blonde hair? (I nod) Does she have dark eyes? (Again I nod)

(She takes out a crumpled photo from an inside pocket of her long coat and holds it out to me) is this her?

(Yes I tell her.)

She is my idol!

2. You raided Lara Croft's Cornwall Manor a little while ago...did you get to socialize with Alister and Zip while you were there, or was it more of a passing visit? If you did, what did you think of them?

Zip and Alister? Were they the two losers that I stole an earpiece from?
(yes I say.)

Oh, well in that case I had brief encounter with them.

(I ask her to elaborate and she takes another swig of wine before continuing.)

Yes. When I smoked the tech room out, I heard a piercing girly scream from that American dimwit Zip. He hid behind Alister and screamed “Ahh! Alister Kill it! Kill the scary smoke thing!” (She laughs, clearly amused) Alister on the other hand tried to attack me with a crucifix and a dictionary.


3. Ever wanted to dabble in bisexuality?

(A mischievous expression comes across her face. She then looks to the floor, clearly reluctant to answer.) Yes, (she coughs nervously) I have had a few bisexual experiences in the past, yes.


Natla'd has a present for you… it's an Alister plushie! Made of canvas with a removable suit, you can take him to bed with you. Hell, if you're going to have a cuddly toy, at least make it a sexy one.

Um… (She blinks a few times, obviously not impressed,) Thanks, I need a place to keep my needles. (She grins wickedly)

lara_lookalike asks:

1. How did you escape when Lara left you in that tomb in Peru?

My friend, (she touches the purple stone of her necklace) gave me the strength I needed to escape.

2. Were you going out with Rutland?

(She gives me a dark look,) I have already answered that you moron!
(I quickly move on!)

3. Are you grateful that Lara never killed you in Bolivia?

Yes, it gives me a chance to attempt to return to Avalon and acheive my destiny.(She takes another long drink of wine then belches loudly,) Oh and I can...aslo...I mean Aslsoww...oh for Pete’s sake!

(Obviously the wine is kicking in, I muse. “Also,” I correct her.)

Yes also it gives me time to plooot my revenge on Lara. I have many ideas of how to kill her.

4. Why did u turn into a Goth?

My friend……my little pet…… brought out my dark side in fashion.

5. Do you like Anaya?

No. I have her picture on my wall in my room. Wanna see?

(She leads me into a small room with a single bed, and directs my attention to the picture, ‘How…artistic! I nervously comment )




Lone Raider asks:

1. Do you know something that Lara doesn’t?

What do you mean? Can you elaborate? (I shrug then tell her that was all to the question, before moving on.)

2. If you're into archaeology, why do you dress up like a - erm - dress up so much?

(She hiccups,)Can’t a woman take the time to pamper herself and make the best of her appearance?

3. Deep down inside, aren't you basically a nice girl?

(She glares at me sourly and taking that as a “No” I swiftly move on.)

4. How does it feel to be possessed by some evil dark fart?

It’s not a fart; it’s a mystical smoke demon, (she pouts sulkily) and I am not possessed by it.

5. Have you snatched Kurtis from Lara at some point in the past?

Who’s Kurtis? Never heard of him. I only knew Lara until she was 18, that’s when she abandoned me in Paraiso, (her expression darkens.)

Daventry asks:

1. You and Lara were good friends years ago, now you said you two were never really friends. Did you pretend to be Friends with the other People as well that got Murdered by that Monster.

No, all my friendships back then were genuine. Except for the Sarah, I’m glad she died...evil cow!

2. What was your real intension back then, did you really want to keep that thing as a Pet and were you secretly looking for a way to Avolon?

Initially I was scared of it as it had killed all my friends, but then over time I bonded with it and decided to keep it.

3. What's up with you and Rutland, is he your Brother or your Boyfriend/Husband, how long did you know each other?

(She closes her eyes in distress) Are you deaf as well as stupid? You have asked me this like twenty goddamn times!

(Two actually, I correct.)

(She scowls then stands up ad walks off calling over her shoulder,) I have known Rutland for about 6 years.

(I assume she has gone for wine and take the opportunity to skim through the book I noticed earlier. Next to it, a note has been written, it looks like Amanda’s favourite quotes from the book…)





(Hearing Amada approaching, I quickly snap close the book and put it back where I found it.)





4. Where did you get the Crates with the words Natla on them, do you know her.

James knows her. They went to the same school as teens and are both wealthy business people. Ms Natla offered to help us with our espionage.

Cochrane asks:

1. Winston claims that you had the idea to lock him in the freezer. Is this true and if yes, how did you get that idea? If not, who had the idea?

(She chuckles then lifts the bottle to her mouth but misses, managing to pour the red liquid down herself. She doesn’t seem bothered...either that or she is too drunk to realise.)

Yes…I remember that. I never liked that Butler to be honest. Whenever I went round there he would always offer me horrible cups of tea then fart at me when I declined. So I thought I’d teach him a lesson by killing him with the freezer. I found it funny but for some reason he did not, and I was banned from Croft Hall. It’s a shame he didn’t die, I could have spat on his grave.

2. Is there any hierarchy among Rutland's mercenaries? Are there some that are more intelligent than others? Where could I get a bunch of them if I ever needed to?


To be honest they’re all about as bright as a two-watt bulb! As for the mercenary team… we hired them from an organisation run by Marten Gunderson. It was called the Agency.

3. What does such a strange black steam monster eat?

It doesn’t eat very often…about once every 5 years. It feeds on human souls, that or steamed vegetables.

4. Do you fly the helicopter or did Rutland fly the helicopter?

I flew it. And I am a better pilot that aLl of yOuu!. (she gets up, quite wobbly now, and points at imaginary people in the room) And YOU! And im better than youuu…(she fades and flops down again)

5. Would the portal really have exploded if no one had pulled out the sword, or did you just say that to annoy Lara?

I was telling the truth. The portal is a space time anomaly which will explode if the sword is not retracted. The sword is basically a key which opens the portal and closes the portal when removed.

Lara's Backpack asks:

1) Where did you buy your coat? It's very nice!

I love it too, 100 dogs died to make the inside of it, makes it all the more cosy.

2) Why are you so eager to get to Avalon?

Because it has always been my dream to discover unknown mystical worlds and the rest is none of your business.


3) Is James Rutland a good kisser?

I’ve had better, (she gulps half the bottle of wine then gasps sharply and screws her eyes closed as the liquor burns her throat.)

4) You've studied every religious and mystical system in the world, past and present. Which one is your favourite?

Avalon will be my greatest conquest! Maybe second to Lara (I gasp, but am too shocked to ask more)

5) Did you really lock Winston in the freezer?

Yes, (she says through gritted teeth,) I told you before.

Hunter asks:

1. Do you eat healthy, or you're on a diet?

The entity of the stone around my neck drains my energy, meaning I loose weight. I do eat healthily though but because of the entity I am anorexic. My silicon chest gives me extra weight too.

2. Are you aware that if you dye your hair brown you resemble Lara?

And a dog at the same time. I am a natural blonde isn’t it obvious!? (I look to the side)



3. Are you British 100%?

No, my father was Russian.

Here is a present for you from hunter: a portrait of Amanda dressed as a lady in white clothes, with the message: 'A new start.'

A New Start? What the hell is that supposed to mean?! I am damn well on top of my game- (she falls down, on to the floor and her hair becomes soaked in wine!)


CoffeeBean asks:

1.) Is Janice your mother? (Janice is a prostitute in AOD.)

No, my mother died in birth. I have never heard of this Janice.

paul123456 asks:

1. Are you a lesbian?

(She blushes then giggles like a girly girl,) I was a bisexual.

jarhead asks:

1) Do you use industry strength bleach to kill your hair that white??

No, (she growls noticeably frustrated,) it is natural! (she swishes it around, trying to be sexy, but wine goes flying in my eyes and I get a burning pain! )

2) Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have Lara knowledge and wealth?

No. I am just as clever as Lara, if not clevererer. As for her wealth…(she sighs)

3) Do you love Alister and Zip- hence you stole their headset to have a little one on one chat with them during a lonely night??

No I do not love either. Zip obviously loves himself and Alister is blatantly gay.

4) Are they fake tattoos??

No all 5 are real.

5) When you go into a dark tomb- does your aluminous white hair act as a light bulb??

Erm… no.

Eleana asks:

1. Have you had botox?

No I most certainly have NOT! How dare you say such a thing! I bet that ageing sow Lara has though.

2. You lost your shoe in Peru. Did you not stop and think "Damn, my shoe fell off?" You must of felt pretty stupid.

No, funnily enough I the thought didn’t cross my mind. I was more concerned about holding my breath.

Hypnosos asks:

1. You have ugly tattoos. Do they actually mean something
g or do you just like ugly things on your body?

They are of the Avalonian language which is significant to me being able to control my pet.

2. How and when did you meet Rutland? Any love involved?

OH FOR GOD’S SAKE! ENOUGH WITH THAT QUESTION!

3. Wood you be interested in a threesome with you, Lara and Zip?

No…not with Lara or Zip. Others possibly.

4. How does it feel to fly when you turn into an ugly creature?

I hardly remember what happens when it takes over.

5. Why did you become a dark person? You looked so much better in your old clothes, and without the tattoos.

I have already answered this question. The entity of the stone I wear changed my personality.

MickiZ88 asks:

1. Do you regard your self as a blonde bomb shell?

No. But I am very pwettyful and I like bombs. (she burps)

2. Do you think you'll be able to put up the competition with Lara by being the sexiest woman?

Of course, Lara is butt-ugly compared to me.

3. Can you explain about Avalon... and what you meant by saying you should have been in Avalon?

It was my ambition to travel there and explore the mysterious world.

4. Are you thankful Lara did not take your life... or do you hate her for not doing so?

(Waving her hands in dismissal she growls irritably,)Oh **** off! You’ve already asked me this!

5. I'm sure you ain’t a typical Blondie.. or are you? You seemed to be wise.

I am (hic!) wise.

keith asks:

1. The Avalon thing sorta went belly up on you. Soz about that. I still luv ya!! ^.^ What do your tattoos mean?

(Sighs in frustration,) They are Avalonian inscriptions. Quit asking, you deaf *****.

2. How did you escape from that tomb in Paraiso?

(Her mouth twists into a grim frown as she stares at me, a look of pure contempt on her face,) I have answered this question already and do not wish to comment on this subject any further.

3. What were doing ever since before you started hunting Excalibur.

Research.



4. Its been said your were a bit of a hippie back in college. Since the tragedy your look changed, far from a hippie. Do you still have any hippie in you? Poetry, actual good music? ^.^

Yes I still enjoy the music although I now prefer more depressing stuff. And it was no tragedy, I’m stunning now (I shield my eyes, but she doesn’t swish her hair, thank god)



ara asks:

1) Tell us about Avalon.

Make me!

Janny asks:


1. Why did you get tattoos in the first place?

The one on my arm appeared over night after I escaped Paraiso. It had strong links to the entity which I command. I got the other shortly after.

2. The tattoo on your abdomen (yes, the one really down)- didn't it hurt when you had it made?

Yes, I cried like a widdle baby and snuggled with my teddy bwear,

Francis.

3. Just a little comment I want Amanda to receive: You go girl! You got good looks and your evil! Keep it up!

Why thank you for your morbidly beautiful words Janny.

TombRaiderLover asks:

1. Why are you so evil?

Don’t know. Cause I want to be. Look, (she holds up the book I was looking through earlier and grins stupidly,) this is my book and it tells me how to be evil.

2. Tell me your best childhood memory with Lara.



Well we were 17 and we were both drunk. She fell asleep and while she was out I drew all over her face with a permanent marker. She woke up the next morning and didn’t notice until everyone in class began laughing at her. It took her a week to get it all off! Probably an improvement, ugly *****.

3. What was Lara like as a child?

I didn’t know her as a child. She was probably as ugly and stupid as she is now.

PRESENT: It's a knife to stab Lara with. Good luck!

(Her eyes glisten with malevolence as she snatches the knife,) THANK YOU! (She begins to prance round the room like a deranged maniac who has just escaped from the Looney bin.)

1.Are u slut?

No.

2.Why do you look so ugly now?

I know where you live! (she makes a stabbing motion!)

3.Why do you hate Lara?

Isn’t that obvious? She left me to DIE in Paraiso! Wouldn’t you hate someone if they did that to you?

4. Are u Sophia's sister.

No, I am an only child. However I do idolise her! She’s sooo prettyful don’t you think?

(I nod vigorously, fearing she may get violent if I disagree.)


Baslakor asks:

1.What is your favourite music band (Or your top 3) ?

I like depressing Emo music such as songs from Three Days Grace and panic at the disco. I also like music from foreign countries. Oh and Pink rocks!

2. Where can I find more of those pets? I want one too! *jealous*

There was only ever one and its MINE!

3. Would you like to watch TV with me and my girlfriend in a large waterbed?

(She smiles impishly,) Of course...I am very open-minded and like to try out new things.

SCION05 asks:

Are you secretly related to Natla?

NO! (She grabs the empty wine bottle and hurls it at me, infuriated. I barely manage to avoid this and Panicing I dive from the sofa and scramble to my feet, heading for the door.)

Get back here you coward! (She chases me.)

(As I approach the door I shout over my shoulder,) Scion05 also asks can you send me ur pet please???

No!( She bellows,) Get out of my house!

(I launch myself through the front door and slam it shut bofore Amada can grab me and drag me back in.)

I’ll kill you and eat your spleen! (Amanda cries as she rattles the door knob and bangs on the door, which I have my back pressed to, to halt her advance.)

Also, (I call from the other side of the door,) Scion has enclosed their number; (I scribble it down on a piece of lined paper from my notepad and slip it under the gap in the door.)

(I hear a demonic scream of anguish come from Amanda then sprint over to my car.)

[tha_mattster]

Hope you enjoyed it!

98% was written by Hazel, I did the graphics and the other 2%


If you missed the other interviews see below:

Winston
http://www.tombraiderforums.com/showthread.php?t=64280
Zip
http://www.tombraiderforums.com/showthread.php?t=64329
Alister
http://www.tombraiderforums.com/showthread.php?t=64227
Lara
http://www.tombraiderforums.com/showthread.php?t=64377

[ara]

That is great thanx!

[sweetPoison]

Originally Posted by tha_mattster

Hope you enjoyed it!

98% was written by Hazel, I did the graphics and the other 2%

You are such a Joker!!

[Cochrane]

That's the best one yet, and the others were brilliant already!

[Paperdoll]

Amanda's white trash

[tha_mattster]

Originally Posted by sweetPoison

You are such a Joker!!

what? Thats the truth!!

Hazel wrote the first draft, I suggested a couple of changes then she re-wrote it! I only added a couple of words here and there.

[Hazel]

hehe, I liked the little adjustments you made there tha_mattster. Cool photo's and the Anaya dart board thing rocked! And to defend tha_mattster...I did write the firsr draft....tha_mattster just tweaked it a little and did the piccies which are fab btw!

And I'm glad I escaped that house! I like my spleen too much for Amada to eat it!

[tha_mattster]

Originally Posted by Cochrane

That's the best one yet, and the others were brilliant already!

Lol thanks! its the only one I didnt write! (sob sob)

[Hazel]

Originally Posted by tha_mattster

Lol thanks! its the only one I didnt write! (sob sob)

Yes but you editied this one which I thought was one of the best reponses out of al of them!

1) Where did you buy your coat? It's very nice!

I love it too, 100 dogs died to make the inside of it, makes it all the more cosy.