Kurtis: The Interview!

[tha_mattster]

(note:some people forgot to write their names at the top of their questions, and i forgot to type some of these myself, but you will recognise your questions)




===========================

(Early morning, and I have arrived at Kurtis’ flat in London carrying a big statue and various other gifts)






(Sorry KTEB I can’t legally give you the address )

(I walk up to the front door and press the buzzer)

(He answers and lets me in)

(Not a shabby place…def. better than Amanda’s crap heap!)



(He opens the front door, dressed in his usual khaki combats and that top)

(We shake hands and he shows me through into a room with two chairs and some odd ornaments)

Don’t ask, they were presents from Lara. You can begin now if you like.

(He seems pretty friendly to me…anyway had better get on with the questions)

(Firstly I warn him some of them are quite. . . ‘forward’ and ask him not to be offended!)

--------------------------------
--------------------------------



lara_lookalike

1.you are ssssooooo sexy!will you marry me??

I don’t really wanna get married, ‘specially to a girl I’ve never met.

2.do you fansie lara?

(I translate into American for him, ‘Do ya have tha hotts for lara? ^.^ )

Sure I do, do you know anyone who doesn’t like her?

3.why did you not kill lara when you frisked her in the louvre?

I had no reason to kill her. It’s The Cabal I want to get rid of, not Lara.


4.was there ever a kiss shared between you?

The first kiss was between me and her fist, and later her boot. But then….ya know…she got to know me and things have changed, for the better. (he smiles)

5.what was going through your mind when you were frisking lara??

I could tell Lara liked me and I was looking forward to ‘meeting’ her again.
(I blush, and remember to throw something sharp at the writer of this question x.o )




Janny:
- why didn't you get yourself a backpack, like Lara did, instead of having that little bag stuck to your side?

Lara has her stuff, I have mine. Backpacks are for school kids anyway. I got my bag in the legion, I don’t need another.

-when and why did you started smoking?
When I was at school my ******* friend persuaded me to start. I’d like to give up, but it aint easy. I did stop when I started in the legion, totally messes with your fitness, but then recently…its been kinda stressful so I’ve started again.

-ever tried to quit smoking?

I did quit, but now I’ve started again. I already said that. I’ve got other priorities at the moment, I’d like to stop soon.

- can you swim?

Of course I can, I’m a great swimmer. I had medals from back at school.




Volcano:

Present!
A Lara model in a binki...AOD version!
Life size!
Hope you can carry it tha_mattster!

(I pull off the black drape that was covering the statue, how embarrassing >.< )

(his eyes go really wide)

Woaah…..awesome! I prefer the real thing though.

Would you marry lara_lookalike?

No, she’s way too young…I’d be arrested.

Would you marry Lara?

I’ve never asked her. I wonder what she would say. Maybe it’s best if we just date.
Angel 14

1.Ever thought about spying on Lara, while she's having a shower?

Why should I have to spy?

(I take some deep breaths!)

4. what kind of house do you live in?

I don’t have a house, I’m renting this place in London right now. Well…as you can see, its small…I don’t know …there isn’t much to say about it is there?

(I take some photographs)









5. What's your lifestyle? (Habits, favourite foods, etc.)

That’s a complicated question…hard to say what my habits are, you would have to ask someone else. Favourite things? Well I like red wine, French red wine that is. I like motorbikes too.

Camera Obscura- Can you tell us more about your chirugai and the Boran X?

In 2001, when my father died, a small crate was delivered to me. I don’t know if he sent it. Anyway, inside was the chirugai. All members of the Lux Veritatis will receive a chirugai at some stage in their life, and are trained to use it quite early on. It’s like learning to ride a bike; once you learn you never forget. I just focus my mind on it, and it does what I want…I can’t really tell you anything scientific about it.
I made the Boran X with the help of Herr Gunderson. I used to work for him and he designed individual weapons for us, I changed my model a little, but it’s mainly the same.


-Can you tell us more about your family history and other relatives?

I can but I won’t. Maybe another day…that’s a really long story.


-Where are you now and what have you done since the incident in Prague?
I’m here in London. I was pretty badly wounded back in Prague, and I could not stay in hospital for long because the Cabal were after me, so I came here for safety. I’m not well enough yet to do much, but I help Lara Croft how and when I can.

Daventry

01. Can you crouch, because it seems you have a back problem.
Have you ever been stabbed through your spine? It does make movement difficult.
02. Do you always jog when a Monster is chasing you.
Well that depends how fast the monster is moving, doesn’t it?
04. I hope you get to know Lara better so that you two can get married and have Children, you two seem to match.
I doubt that will happen.
05. Why did you leave after Lara found your Chirugai, you wasted the moment where she could've come to you and begged you not to die.
You expected me to sit there and bleed to death? I needed to get to a hospital. Anyway Lara found me and returned my chirugai, whats the problem?

Questions from Legend of Lara! President of PBKB!
1. Can I have your weapon?
Why would I give my only Chirugai to a complete stranger?
2. Are you in love with Lara?

You’re obsessed. Quit asking if I’m in love.
3. Where did you get that shirt?
From a little French shop across the street, that’s where I got it. It’s called ‘Crâne en flammes’

4. Have you ever been to Croft Manor?
Yes, twice. Two months ago, and last week.
(How do you have such luck I ask?)
Not luck, Lara just needs my help sometimes. Sure she knows a lot, but I have specialist knowledge that can help her.
(So ‘specialist knowledge’, that’s all she got from you )
Next question - . -


From Eleanna123
1.How tall are you?
5 foot 11.
2.How much do you weigh?
Not sure…I don’t have any scales here. I don’t want to reveal this information anyway, my enemies could use it against me.
3. What model is your motorcycle?
Originally it was a 1970’s Harley Davidson, but I’ve modified it a lot, so it doesn’t really resemble the original.
4. Why didn't you want to kiss Lara when she leaned in?
There’s a time and a place, when I’m facing attack from a group of mercenaries, is not the time.
5. Will you marry me?
Sure why not (he laughs) I’ve seen your photo, you’re older than lara_lookalike, but still a bit young for me sorry, call me in a few years, we could hook up.

Natla'd

Can you explain why, despite being beefed up and in posession of some kind of poser weapon, that you're still more pansy-ish than Alister Fletcher, and also way less sexier than him?

Who is Alison Fleecher? Is she sexy?

(I think he misheard me! I tell him it’s a man)

No thanks I’m not inclined that way!

How does it feel to be the poor man's Larson (Larson being a far superior person from Lara's past who managed to kick arse despite the lack of afore mentioned poser weapons)?


I don’t know this person, Lara has never told me about him, I think you’re just making up men and telling me they are superior to me in various ways! I’m content with myself thanks.

Are you gay?

No.

1.Are you alive???

Hello (he waves at me)

2.Do you love Lara?

We’re just dating…don’t go all soppy on me.

3.What do you think about Lara?

Can you be more specific?

(Umm…what do you think about her….hair?)

I like her hair….long….brown…..

(He seems to have gone into a daydream!)

4.Do u have any brothers or sisters?

Yea, I got a twin brother, not an identical twin though. I’m the handsome one.

1.Do you have any tattoos?

Just one.

(he lifts up his top and reveals the letters ‘LV’ tattooed at the lowest part of his stomach, just above his belt)

3.Do you think you're hot?

Well, my old girlfriend used to call me ‘Hotis’…

4.Where do you live?

In east London. In this flat.

5.Are you single?

No.







sweetPoison





1 - Are you really American, as I believe that your accent is fake?

Wanna see my passport?

(I nod)

(he searches through his bag for a minute)

S**t, I can’t find it!

(I’m sure it will turn up I tell him)

2 - We all know that you indeed like Lara, but what, to you, is her best feature? For example, do you like her eyes, or her sexy figure, or her hair, her cut-glass English accent, or even her pouty lips?

I like them all, especially at the same time. I hate when she wears her hair in a pony tail though.

3 - I love your motorcycle! What type is it?

You asked me this before!

4 - Oh, and your cigarettes, what brand is it? Also have you tried quitting? If yes, can you please give me some tips??!!

I don’t buy brand cigarettes, just the tobacco and then I make them myself. Whats so fascinating bout cigarettes anyway? You keep asking me about them! Tips for quitting? Well, just stop. Its all in the mind and you can control it if you really want to.

5 - Where would you take Lara for your first date? (*The Louvre is not allowed, as you have already met there!!)

Lara loves the Musee D’Orsay, so I would take her there.



Jackali
1. Are you a better motorcycle rider than Lara?

We’ve never raced, I think I would beat her though.

2. What the hell is that crazy red thing on your t-shirt?

It’s a flaming skull, from ‘Crâne en flammes’. You can get one yourself…if you find the shop that is.


3. Why do you only move certain things with your mind and not others?

It takes some concentration to use my abilities, I cant just use it all the time.


Pablo.CT

1.What Style of fighting do you do?

None particularly, I was taught kick boxing in the legion, I just think on my feet really.

2.Where about in the U.S.A where u born?

In a crappy little place on Ohio.

3.How did it feel getting impaled?

Damn painful, but I passed out for a while so that was lucky.

4.Have u ever been to Croft Manor.

Why do you have to ask me twice?

5.What did u want to be when you were a child?

A motorbike racer, or an Olympic swimmer.

Paperdoll:

1.How big is it? The chirugai of course... what were you thinking you pervert?

It’s pretty big, about twice the size of my hand…the chirugai that is.

2.Any good cure for headaches? *ahem*

Quiet music and a romantic night with a lady.

3. Don't you think you should've at least bought Lara dinner at Cafe Metro before feeling her up like you did?

I wouldn’t buy anyone dinner at Café Metro, even Janice would not eat there.

(Who is Janice? I enquire)

Oh…forget I said anything.

Here is Paperdoll’s address.

(I hand over a bit of paper with the details)

Whats this for?

(A date, I suggest)

Oh, right….ok.

PirateRose


3. Don't you think Lara can kick your arse before you could lay a hand on her?

Maybe, but why would she do that? I’m a nice boy. (he grins)

SpongeBob Lover:
1.Can i have your shirt?? PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Go and get your own cheapskate.

2.if you can touch one part of laras body which part would it be?

Her mouth.

3.where did you get your chiruga from??

It was sent to me, I don’t know who sent it though.

ivannnnn

-Do you love Lara?

How many times do you have to ask that? Can we move on?

Melonie Tomb Raider



3. Do you miss Lara?

I saw her last week…but yes I do miss her a bit. She is such a good friend.
Cochrane

1. Where have you been after Boaz tried to kill you?

I went to hospital and then to London, like I already said.

2.What were you doing in Cafe Metro in Paris and the streets/channels surrounding it, other than watching Lara?

Researching the cabal and the obscura paintings. Sure I’d have rather been watching lara more, but business comes before pleasure.

1.Did you know about Lara and her mission then?

Yes, Lara Croft is renowned in our circles. I guessed she might be involved somehow.

2.What's up with those strange powers you have, how did you get them ?

I’m a member of the Lux Veritatis by birth, I don’t have to do anything to get them, but I did need training to hone my abilities.


5. I would think that it is very difficult getting ammunition for a pistol you designed yourself, but you never seem to have any problems in that regard. How do you do that?

Yea, I have to alter regular ammo to fit my pistol.

3. What are your favourite party tricks?

Using my psychic abilities to assassinate the host. I’ve only done that once.

(remind me not to invite him to my birthday!)

5. Furry handcuffs or ripped up white cotten?

Leather belts with big gold buckles, just like Lar….forget I said anything.

(I can hear police sirens nearby)

Hey can you excuse me a minute, I need to check that out.

(he walks out of the room , I see something shiny fall out of his pocket, and then I hear the front door open then close)

(I pick up the shiny thing he dropped, it’s a ring, with funny markings! I put it in my pocket, a souvenir for KTEB )





(okay so now…I’m all alone in his flat!)

(Must snoop ^.^ )

(But where?)

(The bedroom!)

(I leave the room, and walk along the corridor to what I assume must be where he sleeps)

(I turn the handle….it’s open!)

(So I can see a small, plain looking double bed, a chair and some drawers)





(To the drawers!)

(I slide the bottom drawer open)

(There are many photographs, many of him and lara! Some are even in frames)
























(I can hear someone at the front door, so I sprint back where I was)

(two seconds later he comes into the room)

Sorry the police are searching for me, I think they’re getting closer…anyway should be ok for a while, you can continue the interview…

Shark_Blade

1.You are gifted with the ability of farsee and attacking with your chirugai. Is every Lux Veritatis is gifted with both abilities?

Yea, like I explained we are born with these abilities.

2. Pity you and Lara lost both of your parents. How do you feel about that?

How do you think I feel, are you dumb?

3. Your nickname is Demon Hunter. Why is that? I haven't seen you hunting down demons?

Well it’s not like you are watching me everywhere I go, is it? Maybe you want to visit The Cabal’s HQ and see the demons for yourself?

(I decline the invitation)



4. Will you cut down on smoking? Try chewing gum instead.

That’s a good idea, bring me some gum next time you come.



TombRaiderLover aks:

1. Do you secretly have a crush on Lara?

We’ve been discussing this for a while now, its hardly a secret.

2.How does it feel to survive and leave Lara looking at a trail of bloood confused? You had people worried!

I’m sorry you were worried. But I was sort of in bad shape then, I needed to get away.

3.Do you think you'll go another adventure?

Sure, when my health improves. Lara is looking into a site in India, we might go there.

4. Here's a pointy thingy to stab people with!!!! YAY!!!

Thanks. I prefer stabbing demons to humans… though sometimes I have no choice.

Tathra asks:

1. At 19 you virtually ran away from the Lux Veritatis and joined the Forigen Legion to hide. Why is that?

Sorry I don’t want to tell you that.

2. Where'd the scar on your face come from (the one below your eye that is)?

An accident in the legion, ripped my face on barbed wire during an exercise.


3. Would you describe yourself as evil or good?

Umm….good.

4. Anything you would have liked to have said to your father, before he passed away?

That’s a bit too personal. I don’t think like that anyway.

6.Why send Lara to kill Eckhardt, knowing full well you may not get your own chance at revenge?

There was a little issue of being stuck with that monster. I knew Lara could do it anyway. We make a great team.

Lone Raider asks:

- If you're so good-looking, how come you move like a monkey?

I don't know what you're talking about. I'm very fit, maybe I have a slight limp because I was stabbed through my back?

(he rolls his eyes)

- Did you kill Werner?

No way. It was Karel.

- present: a chirugai-servicing kit complete with two fanged frisbees for your kids

okaay....well thanks. You know I don't have kids though.


VonCroy360:

1. Where do you live right now?

East London.

2. Do you think Lara is/was in love with you?

How should I know? It would be great if she was. . .you should ask her.

3. Have you heard from Lara since Prague?

Yea we met up in the UK after the events in Prague, and we’ve met a couple of times after that too.

A present: A new shirt, so you can give your old one to me...

There is a conspiracy to get my shirt isn’t there! Well I’m tired of you asking so here it is.

(he takes his top off…sorry KTEB he has a white vest underneath!)

Here you go, take care of it. (he laughs)






xMyrax -
1.Are you willing on getting a proper haircut without the rouch edges?! =\

I’m happy with my hair thanks. It has to be very short in the legion, so I’m happy to have it long again.

2.Will you ever eat Boaz if she was on a restraunt menu? Like "Boaz soup" or "Boaz Beef Chops"?

That’s f***ing disgusting!

3.Will you eat my poisono- I mean my pie?

(he looks really puzzled) Is that a euphemism? O.o

4.I saw a footage of you going through Laras underwear and trying everything on, why did you do that? =\

What a load of crap, I’ve never done anything like that! But I’ve seen footage of a guy at Lara’s place doing just that you know.


Pipolinne
Wouldn't you have better things to do in the Louvre,like watching The Mona Lisa ,wondering,in case the portrait was upside down,if that would have a secret meaning,like " Get out of Here"?

I’m not an art lover, I was more interested in finding The Obscura Paintings. Maybe me and Lara will go back there. (he winks)

-If you were so keen defending LV, why not join the poor lonely skellies?! They would have loved your monkey dance!

What the hell are you talking about? I don’t dance you know.

-Myra is an extraordinary cook!You really should taste her pie!

Oh really…maybe I will one day.





Arch
1) Yuo've been chasing Eckhardt for years! He kills your father!! Why did you let Lara run after him? It was your duty to kill him!!!

A was preoccupied with a 10 tonne monster. Lara did a pretty good job anyway. It’s just teamwork.

2) How can you control your Chirugai? (I hope it's spelled right...) Telekinesis or something like that? I wanna know!...

I guess its something like that. I can’t exactly go to the doctor and ask.

3) Where in the world do you live nowadays?

Try and keep up! East London. Please don’t ask again I’m bored of that question.

4) How could you survive after being stabbed by that flying litter-bug (I mean Boaz)? Do you have also some kind of healing power?

No, I was just lucky I guess. I was told the wound just missed my spine, if it had not I would have been paralysed.

5) Did you ever have a girlfriend? You looked so aroused (can I say this?) when you first see Lara that I thought you never saw a woman before...

Sure I've had girlfriends, but lara...she is something special.

Skygirl
1. What did you felt when you found Lara in the louvre ?

I was not surprised to find her there, I’d been keeping an eye on her around Paris. It was inevitable we would meet eventually.

2. Are you seriously alive ?

(he picks up a magazine and throws it at me! >.< )

There, proof!

(Well perhaps you’re a poltergeist, I ask)

Maybe, want me to throw some more stuff, see if you’re right?

(ok ok You’re alive! I get it!)

3. Your so pretty plz show us your torso =D

I already took my top off, I thought this was an interview, not a strip show.

4. How many girlfriends you had ?

(he looks to the side and mumbles for a minute)

Four.

7.What did you do in your childhood ?

Went to school, like everyone else. It got a bit hard towards the end, because I started my training after my 16th birthday.

MarguieRaider

Where'd the scar on your face come from (the one below your eye that is)?

An accident in the legion, I told you already.

Softegan

1. Why are you such a twerp.

(he raises one of his fingers!)

2. Why did u frisk Lara in the louvre?

Am I on trial for this? I don’t have to answer to anyone for what I do. We’ve really covered this event anyway.

3.Do you thiink you had any right to frisk her?

What is that supposed to mean? I can do what I want.

(suddenly a loud bang is heard at the front door.)

Quick! We gotta get out.

(he ushers me to the back of the flat and opens a window)

Come on!

(I climb out on to the balcony then run down the fire escape)

(When I reach the bottom I turn to say goodbye, but he has gone)

[jarhead]

BRAVO BRAVO

brilliant, i love dollies and myras boaz menu questions.
and the picture of lara and kurtis together

[Tathra]

very well done!

some answers were obvious cop-outs, though...-.-

and some dont have answers!

but oh well, it was very enjoyable, and really well done! Im not complaining, really! Thank you for all your hard work!

[tha_mattster]

which ones dont have answers?

I'll fix them! Its just quite tricky navigating a 4000 word text on this tiny forum text screen >.<

[tomblover]

Very nice! Although the KTEB'ers might be a little dissapointed! I'm one of them, but I'm not a girl!

[Angel_14]

*claps* Wonderful!

Mira' questions' are LOL

Great work!

[Tathra]

Lone Raiders question, and Arch, Q no.5 ^^
EDIT:....hvae no answers, that is...

[Titanium]

LOL, brilliant

Dam, should of asked him what he thought of my comics

[Paperdoll]

*Is waiting for an answer of Kurtis in the mail* I'm not underage!!!

Melonie Tomb Raider



3. Do you miss Lara?

I saw her last week…but yes I do miss her a bit. She is such a good friend.


Was this supposed to be like that?

- If you're so good-looking, how come you move like a monkey? (No offence, I like you better than most Lara-sidekicks)
5) Did you ever have a girlfriend? You looked so aroused (can I say this?) when you first see Lara that I thought you never saw a woman before...

I think that's it, I think there was at least a few more but I can't find them.

Great work though we want more we want more

2.Any good cure for headaches? *ahem*

Quiet music and a romantic night with a lady.

I should slap Kurtis for this, does he really think that could cure my headache? A lady?

[tha_mattster]

I've fixed those two questions, thanks for the tip