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Old 19-01-20, 03:00   #3
LateRaider's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Ship Pierrson
Posts: 2,493

They're real and they affect every asset of your life. Yes, it's very unlikely that your doctors are wrong if multiple doctors have diagnosed you with the exact same disorders.

I'm not someone trying to talk down to you; I'm going to be real about this on TRF for once (And probably regret it. Knowing this site, it's probably going to be used against me in the future...) and admit that I have Borderline Personality Disorder myself. You're not the first person ever who resists and refuses treatment. With BPD people, unless it was our idea in the first place we don't want to do it, period. Whether it concerns coping mechanisms or even hobbies. I've seen other borderlines scream and throw tantrums because their plans didn't go how they thought they should, and even refuse to use coping skills they promised they would use. If we change our behaviors for other people, if we admit that our emotions are an inappropriate level for a reaction, then we're also "admitting defeat" and that we're wrong. And we can't stand being wrong, just like we can't stand being told no.

The problem is that if you keep resisting and refusing, you're not winning. No one does. All you do is push people away from you and lose everything you had. You're not admitting defeat by learning how to cope with your disorders and manage your emotions, you're becoming more stable and easier for others to be around. The cold hard truth of the matter is that no one is equipped to deal with manic elation instead of happiness, or unbridled wrath instead of anger, or deepest despair instead of sadness.

The first step is realizing you have a problem. The second step is starting to learn how to manage it. The third step is accepting it. And the fourth step is coping, which will be a journey that lasts you the rest of your life.

I don't know what country you're from (I'm in the US), but if you're able, look for Dialectical Behavior Therapy, especially for group therapy. And a book that really helped me was "The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation & Distress Tolerance" by Matthew Kay, Jeffrey C. Wood, and Jeffrey Brantley.

Please take care of yourself. You don't have to suffer anymore.
Passing my "Most Iconic Member of TRF" title to MBog
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