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Old 13-01-20, 17:21   #23810
Mani_Man's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Germany
Posts: 4,058

Originally Posted by charmedangelin View Post
I don't want to set off alarm bells, but that sounds concerning. It sounds just like I thought, she is trying to isolate herself and your brother from the family. Has he blocked any of your family accounts? I mean she even blocked family that she didn't have a spat with is very strange. Honestly I feel like this is a pretty big red flag. Is there anyway your family can contact your brother at all, just to see how he is doing. There is a lot about what she says and does that doesn't make sense and isn't on par what others would perceive to be normal behavior. I don't know much about the cultural norms and attitudes in Germany so my information is a bit limited since what is normal and abnormal isn't always the same across cultures, but isolation seems to be a trait that is universally revered to be a bit abnormal and concerning.

That's good you've got some positive news and stuff going on. I'm not an Uncle yet, but my Aunt gave birth to two more cousins of mine a few years ago and it's definitely thought provoking and nice to have new family members.

Anyway, I hope all turns out ok.
My brother has no social media accounts, he isnt a very social person.
He sent everybody in the family a happy new year message at new years eve and he has sent messages to my mom and sisters in law.
It was just "okay" and "I know" to them telling him there are still christmas presents for him or that he needs to this or that in terms of his finances...nothing personal or so.
I sent him a few days ago a funny video of our niece, to which he didnt reply at i dont know if he ignores just me. XD

Like i said, we taught him all his life that he can rely on us, that we are here for him, we told him so during the whole fight and all...if he isnt reaching out to us, there is little we can do at this point.
When you either get no reply or just one word, there isnt much else to do.
He is a grown up, we offered our help and understanding...if he doesnt take it then we cant force him.

The one good thing is that he isnt in a position where he is able to put himself in a financial too bad spot, its one of the good things in germany...the bureaucracy which makes a mess even if you have a ton of money and stuff.

Its hard to babysit the girl and will be even more with a second child, but i never thought it would be so nice to be a uncle and see how a child grows up.
Makes me definitly want to have kids of my own.

Originally Posted by Zsott View Post
Congrats for the nephew!

As for that woman... she needs to go. ASAP. It's not normal from an adult to act like this. If your brother can't see this, then it's due for a family intervention.
One of my sisters in law assumes she is a goner now that she had what she who knows.
Its a incredible immature behaviour at all the whole situation from her.
Yeah she isnt 30 or so and has a lot of life experience, but acting this petty and childish, lying and making stuff up...that is just bull****.

We had something like an intervention after the big fight, when you have 5-6 people trying to explain the situation and the person doesnt understand it and goes: "No its about this and not that" cant do much.
He is hellbent on completely pushing the blame on us despite everything we tried, everything we thought we taught him.
Its a sad thing but it seems like we just have to, as my oldest brother said: "Let him fall on his face to learn".
I dont like the idea since he is my little brother, the guy i got in a fight for, the guy i risked my life when climbing a tree to get him down...but there is only so much you can do for one person.
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