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Old 26-09-08, 17:44   #1
mizuno_suisei
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Wink A bit of an AOD Fanfic

Hi guys. LOL Be easy on me, I wrote this in the last 45 minutes Its just basically trying to explain what happens before and during the first introduction of the game. Please don't flame me for spelling errors, I don't have office so I had to write it in word.

Quote:
The confusion, the messed up thoughts running Lara Croft's head as she recounts the incident that occured not 2 days earlier.

So many things ran through Lara's head when she recieved a message on her answering machine from Werner.
"Lara, I need you help. PLEASE come to paris as soon as you can."
Having only recently recovered from a tragic experience, this sudden request was quite overwhelming.
"You really should go Lara, he tried so hard to find your remains in that pyramid, but we were lucky enough not to find them." Winston said in responce to the answering machine message he had saved for Lara to hear.
"Ofcourse I will go, someone as thoughtful and caring as him really deserves my help Winston" Lara replies and rolls her eyes.
"Lara, He may have made mistakes in the past as we all do, but he sounded very scared and disorientated in that message. You should give him a chance." Winston responds, hoping he will get a somewhat positive reply from Lara who continues to sit there staring out the window.
"Oh Winston, you're so forgiving, why can't we all be like you. I'll leave tomorrow." She finally responds.

"Who is it?" Werner softley asks as he stands by the front door of the appartment.
"Just let me in Werner." Lara exclaims. Werner opens the door and gestures Lara through the hallway and into the living room.
"Please, take a seat. Would you like a cup of tea?" Werner asks as politely as possible which seems to have no affect on Lara.
"No Werner. What do you want from me?" She says as she stares at the clock on the wall. Werner proceeds to sit down and put on his glasses.
"Lara, i need you to get something for me" Werner asks. The cold, rainy, stormy night makes the situation even more appropriate. Its a friendly reminder to Lara of how Werner attempted to save her from the collapsing pyramid in Egypt. How dare he ask me for anything she thinks to herself. She then looks at him.
"Go on" She replies.
"Im tracking 5 obscura paintings for a client, called Eckhardt, but he's a phychopath" He continues and begins to tremble.
'A psychopath huh?' Lara thinks to herself, but thinks of a different responce which wouldnt intentionally insult him. She leans toward him and says
"Why should I care?" Werner begins to feel very chlaustrophobic, so he decides to stand up.
"Because im being stalked! People are dying out there!"
"Handle it Werner!" she says as she stands up and looks down apon him. In a still fragile state, Werner heads over to a table.
"Lara.. Please.. Look, go and see this woman Carvier, she can help" he says as he picks up a small buisness card and hands it to Lara.
"Im going!" Lara exclaims, It's amazing that he is actually asking me to do a favour for him she thinks to herself. She then pushes Werner onto the couch.
"Egypt, Werner, you walked away and left me" She says. Werner suddenly looks behind lara, draws a gun from his cardigan pocket and pushes Lara away.
"Get out!" he shouts. Sudden gun flashes light the room. He stumbles and hits against the walls and furniture. What actually happened doesnt seem very clear at all, like bits of Lara's memory have been taken away.
The gun is then flung out of his grasp and slides underneath the couch.The next thing heard is his body falling onto the floor. Lara begins to walk toward the light emitting from the window where his body lay.
'What have I done? I couldnt have done this' Lara thinks in a state of shock and complete confusion.
'If he's alive, should I even help him? What is the point? He didn't help me in my time of need'. Its all too much so she decides to inspect his body. She kneels down and rolls his body over to check his pulse. Nothing. Werner Von Croy, the man who left her for dead, is dead. A sudden sadness pours into Lara as she lays his body back onto the ground. She stands up and lifts her hands to realise they are coated in blood. Her eyes open wide as she realises she is immediately the prime suspect for the result in his death.

She immediately chooses Plan A, Run. All the emotions running through her head as she runs down flights of stairs and down the dark allyways causes her to stop often to catch her breath and wipe the tears away from her face.
Unfortunately for Lara, all those allyways turn into streets. Seeing someone run through the streets at night while its raining without an umbrella or raincoat is quite odd and suspicious. Lara stops again to take a deep breath and wipe her eyes again. She continues to run and is shocked to see a Police wagon slide and stop into the intersection ahead. 'If only the police were this quick when I call them at home' She jokes to herself before realising she's in deep trouble if she doesnt escape right then and there. Lara's heart skips a few beats as she sees police dogs running toward her from the wagon. She looks to the right and left only to see a door on her left. She looks back at the dogs and uses her body to force the door open. She looks back to see the police men and dogs getting closer which gives her the obvious idea to run up the stairs inside the building. Having to choose whether to go left or right in this state of mind isnt a good thing for her, but realising all to her left is a window, she turns and runs to the right as the dogs approach. 'Oh great!' Lara thinks sarcastically as she approaches a dead end with only a glass window. She turns around to see the dogs only 10 metres infront of her. 'This is it' she cringes. The dogs jump up at her managing to push her through the glass window and falling down into the allyway. She looks up and sees one of the dogs holding her old backpack which she retrieved in Cambodia along with Werner when she was younger in its mouth. 'Damn it' she thinks as she stares at the dog. With no time to waste, she continues to run down the closest allyway, makes a left to approach a railing with a locked gate to its left. She looks around to make sure the coast is clear and vaults over the railing onto the soaking concrete below.
I'd like to continue, but I dont think it's any good. Its also really difficult to write out an actual game-play level. If anyone has any suggestions, feel free to throw them at me ^^
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Old 26-09-08, 23:41   #2
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Very good!

If you're typing it out in Microsoft Word, spelling errors shouldn't be a problem. The errors should have red underlines, and you can just right click it and select the right spelling.

So your plan is to write a fan fic based on game-play levels? That would be quite interesting, and would take a lot of effort. AoD is an extremely long game, it would take a very long time to write all about the levels. It would be nice though, if maybe you could write something else based on the AoD story, perhaps even a continuation, or a romantic tale between Kurtis and Lara. Ideas are endless!

But if you're willing to write a gameplay fan fic, go for it! Make it interesting enough for the readers to keep on reading.
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Old 26-09-08, 23:45   #3
Quasimodo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by coolezpunk View Post
Very good!

If you're typing it out in Microsoft Word, spelling errors shouldn't be a problem. The errors should have red underlines, and you can just right click it and select the right spelling.

So your plan is to write a fan fic based on game-play levels? That would be quite interesting, and would take a lot of effort. AoD is an extremely long game, it would take a very long time to write all about the levels. It would be nice though, if maybe you could write something else based on the AoD story, perhaps even a continuation, or a romantic tale between Kurtis and Lara. Ideas are endless!

But if you're willing to write a gameplay fan fic, go for it! Make it interesting enough for the readers to keep on reading.
That would be an interesting writing exercise. Tomb Raider is probably one of the hardest games to write fan fiction for because Lara is such a Mary Sue.
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Old 27-09-08, 03:38   #4
Lara's Backpack
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Hmm I don't like the tense you wrote in, and also, there are some sentence structure errors. Nothing you can't fix
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Old 27-09-08, 07:23   #5
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Not bad, pretty interesting writing there!
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Old 27-09-08, 13:37   #6
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Hi guys

Thanks for all your replies. I've never really been good at writing anything, I've always tried to write stories in Japanese but not really in english. (By the way, I meant to say I wrote it in WordPad, not microsoft word )

I agree that writing about gameplay would be hard, It would almost seem like a walkthrough but I guess you can twist things around to make it work.

About the tense Lara's Backpack. I realised that from just reviewing it. I actually said
"as she recounts the incident that occured not 2 days earlier." And the following containing alot of Says instead of Said as its supposed to be past tence. I should really go over it, and I might write some more, but I'm not sure. Thanks for the comments everyone

Zac,
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